Subservient Husband (to a loving wife)

Week Away:

2012-01-28T13:03:00.000-05:00

The trip to Montreal was successful. Today, I am busy supporting my wife's weekend plans. Her two brothers and Father are in town. We are hosting her younger brother and his family. I am also doing the laundry from my week away, the ironing, the shopping, and getting things ready for her guests. It feels so good to be back with her. I missed her so badly while away.

The past week while I was away, my wife not only had to single parent in my absence, but her semester at school started. That brings in a whole new contingent of students which creates a spike in her work load. Also, to add insult to injury, she became ill. She needed to see her physician who prescribed antibiotics in response to her condition. It pained me greatly to know I was unable to help her during the week. I was so glad to be able to come home last night and kiss her on the forehead. I made her and the children home made pancakes for breakfast. That felt wonderful.

I was able to keep the CB-6Ks on the whole trip. Airport security on the way out was a non-event, as far as the chastity device goes. On the way back though, I went through a body scanner. I had the e-mail from A.L. Enterprises incase I was confronted about wearing it, but I was not asked and passed through without comment. I know I would not of been able to remain chaste for a week alone in a Marriott. It is just something, sadly, I am not able to do. With the enforced chastity, I am able to return to the service of my wife with the benefits prolonged chastity brings. It was tremendously helpful and I am thankful for my wife giving me the gift of prolonged enforced chastity, and requiring it remain even while I am away.

The weekend will be busy. My wife said she scheduled some time for me to relax from my trip. I am just so glad to be in her presence again, it is enough of a reward. I am looking forward to the week ahead to be reintroduced to my subservient routine under my wife's authority. We will see what the week brings my way.

CB-6ks There & Back Again:

2012-01-22T11:52:00.000-05:00

This past week I was called into Jury duty. My wife had me change into the travel plastic clasps on my CB-6ks instead of the brass padlock. It allows me to breeze through the metal detectors at the courthouse. Since I am traveling M-F this week on a business trip, she is also having me just keep it that way until I return. It will be the first time I am wearing my CB-6Ks for the entirety of a business trip.

I asked A.L. Enterprise Customer Service, and they say TSA is aware of male chastity devices and you just need to tell them you are wearing one if it is discovered in a body scan. My last trip to Montreal I did not pass through any body scanner. The check points just had metal detectors. I am going to print the e-mail from A.L. Enterprises to take with me just in case, but don't foresee any issue.

I am glad my wife is strict enough to require me to remain locked while out of town the whole time. One time I stored my chastity device in my checked bag, but there was a layover and I did not have access to it. The night in the layover hotel did not go well. Had I been locked the whole time, that could of been adverted. This time I will and hope to return to present to my wife a clasp that is still secure to be replaced again with the brass pad lock.

The way the clasps works is each one is imprinted with a unique number. When I return from the trip, as long as the same numbered clasp is on and secure, my wife knows I have been in enforced chastity the whole time. When I mentioned I made it to the three week mark, her reply was, "Thank God." She clearly wants to keep it that way for a good long while.

For her, having me kept chaste past three weeks is just much better. Keeping me chaste through a week of trips to the courthouse and on a week long out of town business trip is of more importance to her since she has discovered the pronounced effect prolonged chastity has my service to her.

This week I will be in a hotel room each night for the whole week. My wife is holding down the domestic routine with the two children. It is a very busy time for her and I feel bad having to leave. At least my return will be still chaste and ready to dutifully refill the subservient role my wife enjoys of me.

Birthday Weekend

2012-01-17T07:10:00.003-05:00

My birthday landed on the weekend. The night before, my wife took me and the family out to dinner at my favorite restaurant, Ruby Tuesdays. I had a full rack of baby back ribs. They were awesome. When we were going to sleep, my wife let me know she expected me to cook her breakfast on my birthday morning. It was her way of giving me a submissive treat. My mother sent me a cookbook as a birthday present and my wife had a fun time ridiculing me about me being a girl who got a cookbook for her birthday. She told me she wanted to have her breakfast from one of my recipes from my new cookbook that my mother sent me. I complied with a yogurt and granola parfait.

My wife choose not to commit to a one year chastity duration for me. She likes the option of giving me an orgasm to counter increasing effeminate behavior while on prolonged chastity. That to me was a bit of a let down, as I feel I am ready for a 1 year commitment and am wanting to give it a try. I concede to her authority though. She did say she will see how it goes and did not rule out that I may end up locked for a year. She said it is kinda up to me as to if I can keep from becoming too effeminate. She likes it when I am chaste and docile, but not effeminate and has found so far about six months to be about right for me. She said to accomidate my request she may go longer this time though and see if she can take me to the one year time frame.

The KSD-G3 is a bitch of a task mistress. Erections hurt, but as someone who needs to retrain my body, the skinneristic tool is welcome, I have to admit. I know it is not as popular of a device as others and wanted to provide these pictures.

This is looking into an empty tube to see how it pushes down on the top of an erection to cause the counter effect..

This is looking at a tube with my penis in it to show the indentation the device causes. Kinda hard to see through the plastic, but with the two pictures, I think you can get the idea.

I can assure you, it works well. I do not enjoy erections and wake up a few times each night having to think boaring thoughts to get rid of the ache.

When the KSD-G3 is ordered, three sizes come (A, B, and C). I tried the "B" size, but had to move to the "A" since the "B" was too constricting for me. A man would have to have an amazingly small penis to be able to tolerate the "C" size.

My wife gave me The Sleeping Beauty Trilogy by Anne Rice over the holidays. It is a classic D/s novel series. I am to the point now in the first book where Beauty has been brought to the Prince's castle and is being introduced to the other submissives (male and female). Ms. Rice does a wonderful job of portraying the submissive mindset in her characters. It is enjoyable to read as one and I am thankful for my wife buying it for me.

I have been told by my wife to continue to publish on Mr. Indy's caption sites. I had stopped pending her evaluation and decision if I should proceed or not. She enjoys me putting my submissive skills to use in a way that provides a modest income. Mr. Indy makes the checks payable to her and I never get to have access to any of the money. It is a very modest amount, but I think she has found it a fun way to enjoy putting me to use. I will be adding more caption post to his site in the coming months, per her request. I am to do so until she says otherwise.

Into The Rabbit Hole:

2012-01-08T11:07:00.000-05:00

About two years ago, I asked my wife if my chastity duration could increase to three months. This marked the start of my chastity being semi-permanent. Since then, I have been permitted about ten orgasms per year, clustered around brief periods of release. I found strangely this a desirable pattern as there were marked changes in me while kept chaste. More importantly, my wife enjoyed it this way and she has since become accustom to me remaining her chastity slave, while she enjoys much more frequent sexual activity then I am permitted.

The one gripe I had was I frequently would seek thrills from the feeling of rubbing my penis against the inside of my cage. The CB-6000s is made of smooth plastic and when kept chaste for a prolonged period, it was a bit of a problem. I sought to counter this behavior by making my own PoI. That did work for awhile, but I was greatly anticipating the manufactured versions. Almost all chastity devices on the market come with optional spikes of one form or another. The absence of this feature from the CB-6000 sets was discouraging.

I bought the Kept for Her KSD-G3 and have been wearing it for about a week now. It is designed to prevent slip-out problems reported with some men. I experienced that when temporally using a larger ring for a spell. Using my #3 ring I can not slip out, but I thought it worthwhile to try the KSD-G3 while I wait for the PoI from A.L. Enterprises due out in Q2-12. I was delighted to find wearing the KSD-G3 is a sufficient counter for the other problem I was trying to solve.

Not only does the KSD-G3 successfully element the possibility of pull-out (there is absolutely no way to pull out of the cage while wearing it), but it also provides the counter I was seeking. There is no longer any enjoyment to rubbing my penis on the inside of my cage. In fact, prolonged erections are discouraged through a mild ache the KSD-G3 causes. It is not the sharp pain of a PoI, but there is really no way to enjoy an erection at all. For me, it is like a dream come true. I feel like the last piece of the puzzle is in place.

I am at the point of my chastity cycle now where my body really seeks gratification. It is 100% impossible to have sexual intercourse wearing a CB-6000. It is not 100% at preventing forms of sexual pleasure, especially when on prolonged cycles as a man’s penis become heightened in sensitivity. With the presences of my new friend, the KSD-G3, this is no longer the case. It is such a welcome addition I can barely put it into words. I feel truly trapped and under my wife’s utter control. It is thrilling and a wonderful boost to my daily life. I can not thank the good folks at Kept for Her enough for making it available to the open market. It is a wonderful product.

Last night, I woke for the first time in a very long time with an erection that was aching. That use to be the case with my home made PoI, but those have been removed for awhile. Being trapped and reminded through discomfort to discourage arousal is a wonderful training tool for a chastity slave such as me. My body needs training and the tools are now in place to assist me in this. Sadly, I am one of those men who without such assistance, I am unable to maintain chastity commitments (perhaps due to my past pattern of frequent masterbation). I see enforced chastity as a gift my wife has given me. Mr. Ric C. said his wife has decided to give him a year of chastity. I told him it was a great gift she had given him. My birthday is next week and perhaps my wife would find it in her to give me the same.

I feel I am ready for such a commitment and to enjoy instead when my wife gets sexual pleasure, as it is her liberty to whenever she wishes while enjoying a dutiful husband who she keeps chaste. She has become more erotic recently and as a submissive, I feel a great deal of enjoyment when she withholds me while enjoying what I am not permitted to. It is one of the ways she is comfortable expressing our D/s bond and to me a year of it would be a wonderful gift.

Locked Tigher Then Ever:

2012-01-01T20:45:00.000-05:00

Pictured above ~ KSD-G3
Security Enhancement for CB-6k

We came home today from my wife's brother's house to find my replacement #3 ring and the Kept for Her security enhancements. I am wearing them both and am glad to say I feel much more of the chastity subjugation then before. I am thankful to my wife for allowing me to purchase them both as I feel being kept locked is a gift she gives me to make my submissive service to her of more enjoyment. The effect of enforced prolonged chastity is known to make me a content and docile submissive for her to enjoy. In turn, it provides me the "key" (excuse the pun) to providing her the service I desire to give her, free of the obstructive effects my orgasms cause. I am excited to look forward to again breach the three week mark in another two weeks. After upgrading my CB-6ks this afternoon, my wife closed the clasp to what may be the last time for the year. She hinted that may be her desire, but time will tell.

The weekend was spent at her Brother's house. With my wife still navigating the transition into her new job financially, the disposable income she enjoys has been curtailed. The trip to her Brother's was an inexpensive way she was able to treat the family to a vacation. The new year is shaping for her seeing a larger amount of disposable income to enjoy as she chooses. As always, I am kept without any access to household funds and am just provided cash for fuel to get me around to the places she needs me to go. This mostly consists of work, but also the few errands she has me run as well. This payday, I am going to be given $75 for gas, and also cash to give the children their allowances. My wife is scheduling to go to the mall to get some new shoes next weekend. Also, she wants to go to the Apple Store to get an Apple mouse for her MacBook. She has included me more in financial discussions as we work our way out of a prolonged difficult spell. First, I was unemployed for six months and then she was. The two together will take some time to get back on our feet and she lets me have insight into where the funds are going incase I have any input for her to consider.

In the week I was mostly away, there were several comments about the blog and the lifestyle in general. Mr. Ajay from India in particular had several questions. I wanted to take a moment to respond now that I am back home and in front of a keyboard instead of just pecking on my iPhone. He believed the lifestyle to be fringe and should not be claimed to be something appropriate for common practice. I respectfully disagree. It is true that society has embraced by-in-large egalitarianism. For instance the recent change in royal lineage to include first-born daughters to the British throne is one recent example. I personally believe male subservience to be something that too will become socially acceptable as was the case for women in by-gone eras. Women in supporting roles was respectable a few generations ago. I see no reason why men holding the same status can not be similarly accepted as society continues to shift. To Mr. Ajay, I would say 'no', I do not think male subservience can be compartmentalized as a fringe kink. There are just too many indicators to the contrary to indicate a macro socital shift. I respect he may hold a differing view, but feel justified in holding to mine as well. In this matter, I feel we just have to respectfully disagree. I see society trending to acceptance of female lead relationships as a more and more common practice.

Holiday Shifs:

2011-12-27T10:28:00.000-05:00

Holidays were wonderful, but got started out on a rough note. I flew to Montreal on business and returned home about 1:00am. The next day I had to unpack and then pack to go to my in-laws for four days. The prospect of not being at home for a space put me in a foul mood. I had arrived home the night before with out my chastity device due to the international travel. My wife took the opportunity to give me an orgasm before bed and then again in the morning. I think the combination of bio-chemical changes and the frustration of travel put me in a difficult mood.

I discussed it with my wife and she agreed to let me be alone once we arrived at her parents house. That worked out well, as I had space to decline participating in family activities while I regrouped. My wife also made love to me after a night out for ice cream alone. She took the opportunity of her parents to baby-sit while her and I went out alone. It corresponded to our twelfth wedding anniversary. She ended my time unlocked with another orgasm the morning before coming back. I have reset my clock and am again locked in my CB-6ks.

I found during my travel that the TSA has lightened the use of the body scanners. I did not need go though one at all in my round trip. Also, I asked A.L. Enterprises Customer Service before I left. They said chastity devices are known by TSA and if it is discovered during a body scan, I would just need to let them know I was wearing one, but it would not keep me from passing security. My wife left it to me to decide if I would wear it back through security, but I had already packed it for the return trip. I need to go back to Montreal next month and I am thinking I will just leave it on the whole time.

Also, I found from A.L. Enterprise Customer Service that the PoI release is being further delayed. It is now scheduled for March. I was going to wait for my #3 ring replacement order, but waiting another three months for the replacement seemed too long. The #2 ring is far too loose for me and I can slip out if I put my mind to it. Instead I placed my order for my #3 ring and also ordered an KSG-D3 from Kept For Her. It will be an enhancement while I wait for the PoI in Q2.

The week current is between the successful Christmas at my Wife's parrents' house and new years at her brother's house. He lives near the coast and my wife is planning on taking the family next weekend. During this week, I have an amazing list of chores to get through since I was away on business last week. There is a lot of ironing and laundry, as well as house cleaning. I am also being conscious of my attitude, since I have past experience to know my behavior is not the best after my wife concedes orgasms to me. Also, I am looking forward to a trip to the local Adam&Eve my wife said she will do with me. I am not sure of her intent, but look forward to seeing what will come about from it. They do have a good selection of books and D/s novelties.

Female Superiority Seekers:

2011-12-14T06:00:00.000-05:00

I occasionally check what keywords are trending folks to my blog from search engines. One that has steadily been creeping up is the key word search "Female Superiority". This one has been gaining over the past year and now is floating in the middle of the top ten. Visitors who frequent my site from that key word go on to view five other pages on the blog and spend an average of eight minutes reading. This makes it the most popular key word for new visitors.

Most who blog in this subject do not bridge the gap into female superiority and socital changes that are reflective of the truths becoming evident with increasing clarity. Some do, but most are focused on exploring the kink of FemDom. I personally do not believe there is justification to suggest women are superior in all things. I do find there is an inescapably clear trend of female advancement and tectonic shifts in the underlying fabric of our society as a result. Just a few generations ago, women were compelled to shelter under the physical superiority of men as societies were in firstly a pioneering phase and then an industrial phase. Both had a premium put on physical strength. Just as indicated by there being no women in the NFL, in these societal strata women were relegated to concede the need of male physical superiority to provide livelihoods and safty.

In a post industrial society, this is no longer the case and women are able to excel in the areas they have superiority in. Ms. Hanna Rosin does an eloquent job of verbalizing my view about this in her TedTalk video (linked below). Why this is a topic on a wife led marriage blog I find only natural. To me the concept of men enjoying living subservient to their girlfriends and wives is a wonderful pairing with the changes occurring in our society which make this a practical relationship model. The converse was true during patriarchal times. Women feeling free to assume the same leadership roles men enjoyed now that our society is placing a premium on skills they are superior in is only due course coming to fruition.

I am authoring this post in an attempt to welcome those who reach my blog from female superiority inquiries. Although you are most likely not apart of a kink community, your societal views mirror my own. My blog can be a resource for you to gain some insight into how such a relationship can be rewarding for both partners. I am not a relationship expert. I just write what I find works and it has proven to be helpful to many who have frequented the blog. If you wish to read an article by a relationship expert on the subject, I recommend the short introduction to male chastity by Dr. Tanya Larisse which can be found by clicking here. There are also several others linked below.

I believe women are superior in skills society is placing a premium on and as such men will need learn how to live subservient in increasing frequency. I also believe necessity is the mother of invention. Some suggest this will be a slow process, but I believe the change will be occurring rapidly. I look forward to a day when I can live in overt domestic and financial servitude to my wife and she can be held in high regard for keeping her husband on a subservient leash. The converse was true and now that there are trends which promote expectations of men holding the secondary role in relationships, I am hopeful she can be seen among her female peers as holding a respectable role in her marriage as the overt head of the house.

To me it is an exciting time in which to be living and the choir of voices which seem to be echoing the same is only growing. Over and over in male submissive kink blogs are posts from young women who say they have come to expect men to live under their leadership in their burgeoning relationships. This is not a kink, but a new societal paradigm that has taken deep root. For those who are of this class, no matter your age, I thank you for your efforts and you have a friend in me.

Sincerely,

-SH

In-Between Holidays:

2011-12-09T20:39:00.000-05:00

It is clear to me the out of town trip caused such an effort on my part as to had made me exhausted. I was sapped for about a week after and had a difficult time staying abreast of my chores. I missed an important meeting I was in charge of taking our eldest child to, and didn’t wash the bed linens as I was scheduled. Also, I just felt constantly hurried and could not shake the feeling for the entire week after we got back.

Also during this time, my wife had to step in to address an emotional derail I was having. She let me vent and a few days later applied a punishment as correction. I had to stand on a stool with my heels hanging off for an hour one night and 45 minutes the next night. It was quite uncomfortable. My wife let me watch a movie on my iPhone while I stood there. It helped me be able to be dismissed by her while she did classroom work. She tells me it will be my new punishment I can expect when I misbehave.

Christmas season is quickly approaching. I am working with our eldest to keep him on track with his school work. It is a big project since his math grades have dropped and he is struggling with the material. I intervened to develop some basic study skills with him and also assigned extra problems with the material he struggles with. With the holidays on the horizon, I am being diligent in this task to ensure its importance is respected. Also, my wife let me know she volunteered her home to host her department’s holiday get together.

With the busy holiday season, I am glad that I seem to have recovered from the family trip. With being past the three month mark in chastity, I am starting to feel some feminine inkling again. Knowing what to expect this time, I am aware of suppressing them when out in public with my wife. She doesn’t seem to mind if I am a bit of a fairy while we are alone. I do not know, but I suspect she will simply grow accustom to it and let the six month mark lapse w/o letting me out for an orgasm to counter the effect. That is not scheduled until spring time though. It just seems she is enjoying me kept chaste and I think she will end up deciding to just leave it that way. Just a little rambling from the chastity journal. For today, I am appreciative for living as a submissive to a wife who is now more liberal in her punishments of me and to be able to wear her necklace she gave me as a form of submissive collar. Those two are welcome additions for me to enjoy the submissive pleasures from and I am appreciate to her for their additions.

A Reminder:

2011-12-04T17:16:00.001-05:00

My wife gave me a necklace of her's to use as a symbol of my submissive role. I started wearing it about a week ago and found when I wear it more taught, it brings to the surface feelings that I was hoping for. It is like I am made aware of being an intrinsiclly horney man who is being kept locked up and chaste to be all wound up for my wife’s service. My sexual frustration boiling over and channeled instead into nimble service.

Something about being collared by her and living openly as her little locked up chastity slave who she keeps in indescribable sexual frustration as a way to form me into her docile husband of service is erotic beyond words. I want to be used by her, abused, shown my place, and openly show her how I am dying to do anything she asks without hesitation.

This weekend saw me getting into trouble with a bad bout of pouty behavior where I acted like a child. My wife has a punishment lined up for me and I am hopeful she will too follow-up with something corporal. She had promised me to play as my teacher and I being a student in trouble. I can feel the desire to be treated as her naughty bad boy who needs to be taught a lesson and it fills me with an almost uncontrollable desire to throw myself at her feet. I can not wait for the next time she uses me for her pleasure, punishes me, or sets me to a situation where she displays her dominance over me.

She had me remove her exercises clothes after her workout today. After removing her sweaty socks, she held each foot out for me to kiss thoroughly. That and being told I am going to have my inner hyperactive sexual desires kept on a leash so I can instead use my sexual frustration to live a life of service to her is another that I enjoy. She did that last week too, standing in front of me nude, but denying me even to touch her spectacular body. Truth be told, I am good to get her off when she wants, but she has found it is really best to keep me otherwise denied. I can see that too.

Off to cook dinner and into another week. TTFN…

Thanksgiving Week:

2011-11-28T21:35:00.000-05:00

Well, that was an amazingly busy holiday week.

There was a family trip planned to my sister’s house for Thanksgiving. She lives with her husband, an eight hour drive from where we live. My wife told me she wanted to leave on Thursday at 6:30am. Not only did I have to get up extra early that day, but I needed to do my chores and pack the day before. My wife had scheduled me to take time off of work so I could get everything done. She went out and did some shopping and took her car in for a tune up that day.

My sister did a wonderful job hosting. There were a total of three holiday meals prepared in three successive days, with somewhere between ten and thirty people attending each meal. We were in a two room hotel suite close by, but spent most of our time at my sister's house. The children enjoyed themselves and it turned out to be a really nice family vacation. The return put us home about 7:00pm Sunday night. After a rather long time deliberately putting things away, I got to sleep about 10:30.

The vacation had very little D/s. Most of the time was accounted for in group activities at my sister’s house. My wife did express her dominant role while back at the hotel. She would have me undress her while I kneeled on the floor and also expect the busy work be completed by me. Since there was a kitchenette in our suite, I did the little cooking needed while we were there and also kept the room tidy. I also oversaw the children getting ready and unpacking/packing. My wife did none of those. I did help my sister with the mountain of dishes, but I find that hardly worth noting in a D/s context as men doing kitchen duty on thanksgiving is pretty unremarkable now a days.

We are back home and looking forward to the week ahead. I see A.L. enterprises still has not released the PoI for the CB-6000. My #3 ring broke last week and I am waiting on replacing it until the PoI come out so I can get them both on one order. Until then I am using the #2 ring. I tried the #4 ring, but it was just too small. There was some enjoyable CBT effects, but the ring caused a slight laceration since it was so tight. The compacting in response to erections was a little too much and the skin became broken where it contacted the ring. It was nothing that wasn’t back to normal in a day, but just too much to keep going. That was unfortunate as I enjoyed the CBT effect. I am really looking forward to the manufactured PoI to help provide that. Hopefully it will not be too much longer.

Submissives Thankful for Pain:

2011-11-18T21:30:00.000-05:00

This past week, there have been several things I have crossed paths with concerning the concept of submissives enjoying pain inflicted on them by their dominant.

The first was a post by Mistress Tamara’s submissive husband. He has mentioned often in the past how he does not get enjoyment when his wife uses him to feel her sadistic pleasure. His wife on occasion enjoys inflicting pain and her submissive husband accounts the times as a form of service to her, but without any reciprocal pleasure for himself as may be expected in a masochist. In his most recent post in response to an inquiry by Mistress Maui Girl, he accounts Mistress Tamara slapping him in the face. After she does so, he finds himself compeled to thank her. It is a well written post for someone who English is not their first language. I do recommend it.

The second thing is a movie I watched. It is available on NetFlix streaming and called “Leap Year’. In it, the submissive (a women in this case) craves her dominant inflict pain and other forms of maltreatment on her. After he does, she treats him as an honored house guest as her way of expressing appreciation and the two enjoy a spell together before he leaves. The ending is very well done and the movie need be watched all the way to the end for it to all come together. I really enjoyed it and recommend it for anyone who has access to the NetFlix streaming service. The concept of a submissive craving pain and then thanking their dominant is again reinforced in the movie.

Last night, my wife cornered me in our bedroom while I was busy running around doing chores. Thursday evenings are a busy time for me with Laundry. For several minutes she stroked my crotch and watched me while I helplessly suffered the pain that an erection brings in a chastity device with spikes. She was unrelenting for several minutes and as the pain washed over me, I became jello in her touch. It was her way of giving me a few moments of D/s for me to enjoy and display her power over me. As I write this now, it is again having the same reaction and also this morning while I got dressed going over it in my memory.

This concept of a submissive craving pain from their dominant and then feeling the need to express their appreciation to them when given was one Mr. I’m Hers asked me about if it was something that I thought would develop in him too. I let him know I have no way of knowing for sure, but the emotional masochism enjoyed in a disparity relationship is only a small step from being able to enjoy physical masochism. To me, the two are from the same submissive root, but both take time to develop.

Shifts in Service:

2011-11-13T19:16:00.001-05:00

There have been many changes to my 24/7 subservient lifestyle recently. The biggest change has been my wife accepting a job as a school teacher. After she did at the start of the school year, her schedule required her to leave the house at six in the morning. Her and my wake up times consequently moved dramatically backwards. I now wake at 4:45am each work day. This permits me enough time to shower, dress, and prepare my wife’s breakfast in time for when she comes downstairs. This change has curtailed our end of day activities dramatically.

Now, with working a full day, cooking dinner, cleaning, doing some chores, and then tending to the children while my wife relaxes or catches up on some classroom work, we are left with little end of the day time together before going to sleep. Also, with several work week events pushing things to late evenings, it is not uncommon for us to be exhausted come the weekend. Several times, I had to communicate to my wife I was feeling exhausted and needed some time to recover.

This is a big change from previous times where the two of us had more evening time alone. My wife has not really asked for a massage nearly as much as before the adjustment. Instead, she finds brief ways to let me express my subservient stance. For instance, she expects me to remove her exercise clothing. She has a pattern of working out after she is done with school and I remove her shoes, socks (kissing her feet in the process), and the rest of her exercise clothing. I then start her shower and bring her clothing to the hamper. She will enjoy speaking to me while she is nude, knowing my chastity device spikes are causing a twinge of pain. It is something she has seemed to take a liking to. Those times, along with my efforts on Mr. Indy’s caption post web-site are times where the chastity device spikes cause a challenge for me. My caption posts are quite hot and really set me off. Having a catch-22 in such circumstances has also been a dramatic change. Before it was just frustration. Now there is a painful reminder to counter.

Lastly, on 11/11 a new game came out called Skyrim. My wife had known I badly wanted to have the opportunity to play that game, but we lost our PS3 due to a hardware failure and instead replaced it with a Wii. The kids love the Wii, but I had lost interest in gaming after the change. Skyrim does not have a Wii version, due to the intense graphics. My wife made the decision to put a new PS3 in our bedroom and also bought me the game. I have been playing it all weekend (minus keeping in line with my subservient obligations). My wife made it clear she will feel free to curtail my gaming whenever she wants, and even took Saturday night for me to give her a full body massage for two hours. I had missed giving her massages and was thankful she gave me the opportunity.

The shift in schedule, the chastity device spikes, and the new PS3 are all changes I have had to learn to adapt to. Part of the pleasure of living a subservient lifestyle is putting submissive talents to use in an ever changing series of situations, looking to my wife as an authority figure who is willing to use me in her service to fulfill her pleasure. It is a constantly fulfilling way to live. I do hope my wife will start to experiment with infliction of pain on me. I am finding it is something I am craving and she seems to be in the process of finding her way with the concept. I do not know for sure, but I think I may find her more willing to display the disparity between us with putting me into painful moments in new ways in the coming weeks. I will update if that does end up happening. For now, she seems to be just living the privileges of a dominant and experimenting with inflecting pain through the chastity device spikes.

Female Superiority:

2011-11-04T02:21:00.000-04:00

I was reading an article by Jonathan Rauch of Reason Magazine. In it is referenced forecasting by the federal agency National Center for Education Statistics (a division of the Department of Education), which indicates an inescapably clear trend. Women are outnumbering men in conferred degrees. This is inclusive of both Bachelor’s and Master’s. By 2017, the trend holding, there will be 50% more women than men obtaining post-highschool degrees. This is staggering to consider.

There are male chauvinist on the internet who consider this to be a subversive conspiracy which is coming to fruition. I find that to be silly. In my view, the pervasive egalitarian expectations society has placed into daily life have allowed the innate abilities that women have an upper hand with to bear fruit. Women are showing the skills Hanna Rosin so eloquently portrays in her TED:Talk video (linked below) and are simply flourishing more so then males can in the same environment. There is no conspiracy. It is simple free-market capitalist forces at work. When the principle skills in demand were associated with physical strength, men held the upper hand. In a post-industrial egalitarian society, women are able to succeed more so then men. Physical strength is no longer a bread winning skill.

In a macroeconomic view, human intellectual capital resting increasingly in the hands of women will undoubtedly change the fabric of society. This is not a submissive man making a fairy tale about a utopian matriarchal parallel universe. These are real Department of Education statistics which the federal government maintains over decades, using objective, industry accepted practices. We are now in the shift away from working moms coming home for their “second shift” into increasingly accepted domesticated fathers/husbands. My dad never changed a diaper. I know of no peers who can claim the same. In the coming years, subservient husbands will almost certainly become so common as to be often expected by society. I just do not see how our changing society will end on an egalitarian fulcrum point when economic power will increasingly rest with women. There will have to also be changes where men come to accept subservient roles. For me, this is a welcome change I look forward to.

In 1950, Mr. Rauch indicates in his article that fewer than half of Americans obtained high school diplomas. During this time physical skills were at a premium and advanced education did not have the same value it does in our post-industrial society. Men were able to earn good wages in the vast agriculture industries or manufacturing. There were also the trade unions for an avenue to meaningful employment. Those days are gone. Physical skills men hold an upper hand with are primarily limited to use in the construction and military sectors. It is unlikely those will ever change and become sectors where women are employed in great numbers. However, in the rest of the post-industrial economic sphere, intellectual skills demonstrated by obtaining degrees will be held by women and therefore the bulk of the economic decision making will rest with them. The fabric of society will quickly adjust. When men outnumbered women three-to-one in obtaining degrees, women were often expected to marry a man with high earning potential and then learn to live as his dutiful wife. The converse will invariably become true when the numbers are reversed.

Mr. Rauch uses the colloquial phrase, “Wake up and smell the coffee” to jolt the reader into understanding. He goes on to explain the globalization of the workforce makes an even higher premium on human intellectual capital, which women will hold in increasing disparity. The cost associated with keeping the college-educated mom at home while the high-school educated dad works will simply not make economic sense. Enter the increasingly popular subservient husband. This lifestyle will continue to move out of a kink phenomena as macroeconomic forces will force it instead into common practice. I simply see no other way to interpret the data in light of our present economic reality. I find the prospect of overt matriarchal elements in society to be a very real possibility. Not fantasy types of dominance as may be seen in a FemDom comic book, but instead women with expected authority roles over men and men glad to submit. To me, this is an exciting time in which to be living.

National Center for Education Statistics
http://nces.ed.gov/programs/projections/projections2020/sec6b.asp

Hanna Rosin Video:
http://www.ted.com/talks/hanna_rosin_new_data_on_the_rise_of_women.html

Jonathan Rauch is a senior writer and columnist for National Journal and a frequent contributor to Reason. The article was originally published by National Journal.

Subservient Lifestyle:

2011-10-30T06:20:00.000-04:00

This past weekend the children were off of school starting with a half day on Friday and continuing with days off on Monday and Tuesday as well. My wife decided for me to use PTO to be with the children. Also, she arranged for me to bring them to her parents’ house for over three days. She stayed for one of the days, but returned home to work on Monday and Tuesday while I tended things at her parents’ house with the children.

When I came back on Tuesday, I was amazingly busy with chores. That night, my wife let me show her some of the caption posts Mr. Indy has decided to publish that I authored. She did like most of them and one she even alluded to being like ‘art’. That made me feel very good. She then had me go down on her and after she got off, directed me to kiss her feet in appreciation.

Being permitted to give her an orgasm is a treat she is gracious in giving to me. I think she is seeing it that way too now and is letting me express my appreciation after by kissing her feet. She is very good to me to keep me locked in chastity and feel free to flaunt her enjoying herself sexually knowing I am to be kept denied. It is a big change, but one I find I strangely embrace. Her seeing it as something needing me to express appreciation for too is a change, but I do agree that I do need to thank her for being permitted to get her off while being kept chaste. It is a gracious treat she provides me for which I need to be thankful and overtly express by kissing her feet when directed to or any other way she feels she wants me to express it.

While I was staying at her parents’ with the children, the first day my wife arranged for a combination birthday celebration for our youngest son and her mother. It was at Chuck-E-Cheese and my wife bought the food while her parents supplied the game tokens. The group was a total of 11 people and everyone really enjoyed themselves. It turned out great. Both of our children let me know it was the highlight of the trip for them. My wife knocked that one out of the park. The next day her parents treated everyone to a Chinese buffet before my wife left, leaving me and the children behind. I of course, was locked in the chastity device without a key the whole time while at her parents house. It was really a non issue, except for keeping me chaste when I would of otherwise found reason not to. My wife left me with some money to take the children to McDonalds for lunch while she was gone. That and a trip into the forest to enjoy some fall color rounded out a really good mini-vacation.

I find as a submissive, living under my wife’s direction works out well as far as scheduling free time goes. I just let her decide and she lets me know when and where to go when she feels it is time I need to know. I am otherwise kept mostly in the dark as to what her plans may be. This gives her the freedom to mull over options, leaving the final decision until situations warrant. Not having to solicit my opinion unless wanted is a freedom she enjoys. It also is a demonstration to me as to my place in the relationship. I am subject to what my wife wants to do. It is her desires that are fulfilled, with me working to see things as she wants. In that outline, I find submissive pleasure. Also too, I get to enjoy as a participant the things she chooses to do.

With Halloween on the horizon, there is a busy spell for me. Anyone who lives in domestic service knows it is one of the holidays that take an extra toll on the service commitments. I am looking forward to continuing to live as a docile husband to my wife’s authority over me and am hopeful she will find me fulfilling her wishes. It is what I strive for. Also too, I hope she continues to enjoy learning to expect me to express apperciation for giving me the oppertunities to serve her sexually and otherwise. It is her way of being nice to me and her new expection of me in turn expressing this graditude is something I am hopeful she continues to grow to enjoy.

Book: The Subservient Husband

2011-10-25T12:45:00.000-04:00

After about a year into the lifestyle, I began to feel I had garnered enough experience into living as a subservient husband that I thought I could author a book helpful to others who are in similar relationship dynamics. I began to frequent writer blogs. Notably, I enjoyed Nicolle MacDonald and Kerrin Hearfields’ blogs. Both are women authors in New Zealand who maintain writing blogs and are tenacious about developing their writing skills and promoting their works. Following their suggestions, I began by authoring short works of fiction. The two of them critiqued several of these for me and I in turn did the same for them for works they were in the midst of. In my modest way, I feel I improved my skill to some extent.

I had no ulterior motive for my work of non-fiction on the subject of living as a subservient husband. I did not want to convert people to the lifestyle, nor use it as a means of financial gain. I simply felt obligated to contribute to the community in my small way. I realized publishing via an on-demand source such as Lulu or via an electronic vehicle such as Amazon Kindle service were both somewhat limiting. Both of those are ways an unknown author can have works put into a marketplace for commercial consumption. Along with both were some obstacles necessary to productize a work. I felt instead that I could easily provide the “book” in electronic form and since I have no desire for commercializing it, I could simply forgo the obstacles necessary to make it apart of commerce.

The book “The Subservient Husband” is available via the link on the side of this blog. It is a work of brevity which is not acceptable for ones that are paid for. I could of easily made it the standard ten thousand words by over elaborating subjects. I found it was my desire to make it concise and something that could be easily read in one sitting. Also, as something that exists in a dynamic medium, it can be edited or added to as time goes by. That is an aspect unavailable to the static commercial works. I found I desired that flexibility and again came to the conclusion I had no motivation to commercially publish.

The medium is simply a hyper link index of brief chapters contained on the blogger system. I found this preferable to generating a PDF file. I had considered doing so, but if I did, I would lose the ability to version change, as any future changes I made would not propagate to previously downloaded versions. Maintaining it on the dynamic blogger internet system left me free to make changes and not worry about versioning. I altered the chapter posts to exclude comments, but leave this post open for any. To date, it has been read by well over three thousand and averages about ten per day. It also seems to be trending increases in daily page hits too. It is my hope the book is found of comfort and also useful to others who live the lifestyle or are new to the concepts and are looking for an introduction.

Mistress Roulette

2011-10-16T18:07:00.000-04:00

Pod Casts Review:

In the summer of 2011, Mistress Roulette attended the premier event of a new BDSM night club opening near the Los Angeles airport. She was greeted by the proprietor of the club with recognition as a BDSM therapist who had a well known pod cast. Mistress Roulette’s account of the evening indicated the proprietor applauded her efforts, despite some playful banter was had on the pod cast at the proprietor’s expense. The evening at the club was accounted to include many of the patrons recognizing Mistress Roulette and engaging her in accounts of therapy types of subjects. To my estimation, this account indicates successfully obtaining the overtly stated goal of Mistress Roulettte’s pod-cast endeavor which was started two years earlier. This goal being to offer free content in an unapologetic attempt to gain visibility to her psycosexual therapy services. Clearly she is now a fixture of the BDSM community in Los Angeles as well as known around the country and internationally to some extent.

I have now listened to all 45 of the currently available pod casts. This amounts to 83+ hrs of kitchen table talk between a young couple and occasional friends and guests covering the gamete of BDSM interpersonal issues. The format is very much like the Howard Stern broadcast, but with BDSM topics instead. What comes through is the inner struggle necessary for self discovery. At the start, the fledgling couple profess a form of egalitarian dynamic with frequent bedroom scenes. This is commonly known as a man being a "bedroom" submissive, with the D/s dynamic ending when the scene ends. Mistress Roulette also staunchly opposed any concession to concepts of female superiority. Instead, she encouraged a "healthy" approach to living a kinky lifestyle.

As the pod casts continue, it is clear if Mistress Roulette was a nutritionist, the only thing on the menu would be tofu and bean sprouts. When listening to the pod casts, if one drops a nickel into a coffee can every time she utters the word "healthy" there would be a king’s ransom come the last word being uttered. She seems to negate the fact that many Americans enjoy eating fast food, something a nutritionist would demand be stopped. However, it is of enjoyment and convenience to indulge in American fast food, and most do routinely. So to, the style of BDSM she outlines negates the indulgences so many in the community enjoy. In fact, I do not think there was any guest she had on the pod cast that was like minded. The female superiority issue was embraced by Sir Nick, and the concept of 24/7 service submission embraced by Goddess Leeann and Jonathan. Both were concepts Mistress Roulette found unhealthy. However, as a congenial form of table talk, ideas and beliefs on the subjects surrounding BDSM lifestyles were openly discussed and countering opinions were welcomed. She never faulted someone for having a differing belief. Further, she would digest new concepts and sometimes make changes when she felt a change in her stances was warranted.

To Mistress Roulette, the concepts of 24/7 service submission as put forth by Ms. Rika and Ken Addison in their two books is again seen as unhealthy. To me it came across as hyper-cerebral over analysis with a guarded stance against anything harmful where a lifestyle accepted by so many was voided. In her desire to put her undergraduate psychology studies to practice and to express a need to help others, it is clear listening to the pod casts that Mistress Roulette is a good source for someone who is hurt from past experiences to come to for help. Her ability to make connections from past harmful situations into present behavior is quite well developed. However, this also makes her extremely guarded against anything harmful (al la bean sprouts and tofu alone on the menu). For someone who was force fed battery acid by someone trusted in the past (perhaps sexual abuse or some other horrid experience), a menu of bean sprouts and tofu may well be good for a spell in order to get all the battery acid out of their system. A menu of bean sprouts and tofu though I do not feel would be readily accepted by the wider BDSM community.

The seminal moment in the pod casts in my estimation is a moment of brilliant self discovery by Mistress Roulette. She realizes why she has become sexually estranged from her newlywed submissive husband. Since they practice an egalitarian relationship and he is the bread winner, he makes the financial decisions. This is also due to him having well developed financial skills. He chose to purchase a "queening stool". He suggested on the pod cast that it was for a video shoot he was planning, but alluded to Mistress Roulette using it on him. It is clear this was a desire of his he was attempting to make reality. Mistress Roulette realized that he was topping from the bottom. She was unable to confront him on this directly in a forceful way due to their egalitarian dynamic, but was able to make the connection as to why this caused a death spiral in her sexual desires to him. She had a period of sexual abuse as a child and her abuser manipulated her into a similar circumstance. Her newlywed husband doing the same had made her depressed, but these feeling only on a subconscious level and leading to a disinterest in things sexual with him. This realization of the source of the feelings was a moment of clarity for Mistress Roulette and a clear breakthrough in her newly wed relationship with her submissive husband. Her submissive husband attempted to manipulate the situation indicating he had bought the stool just for the video shoot, but the cat was now out of the bag. He had been caught. Further, Mistress Roulette had made a vital connection about herself. She now knows when she is subjected to topping from the bottom by a submissive man, she becomes depressed due to the past abuse.

From here, the pod casts change in tone. It is then clear that Mistress Roulette is taking a more dominant stance and seemed to be altering her beliefs on egalitarian principles in the strict sense they engaged in during their courtship. This vetting of personal self discovery is what makes the pod casts so compelling to listen to. Mistress Roulette at first is a staunch opponent to the polyamory lifestyle. She has a guest on who holds a differing view and finds she needed to adjust her opinion. Her subsequent grappling with the complex emotions on the issue bleeds honesty into the conversation. It is a reoccurring theme of the pod casts that the process of vetting so common in therapy sessions that require coming to terms with hidden and underlying issues is a healthy process and one that leads to life long self discovery. It is this principle that Mistress Roulette masterfully conveys to the listener. The skill of doing so is then developed in the listener and as a result, Mistress Roulette is successful in fulfilling her desire to help others. It is something I am very grateful for her providing as a gift to the BDSM community.

If one is looking for a single of her pod casts to listen to, I recommend the one titled “A Farewell to Departed Friends”. It is my favorite of the entire pod cast series.

Mistress Roulette Chatelaine's Diary of a Dominatrix pod casts can be found on iTunes.

She additionally maintains the below YouTube channel:
http://www.youtube.com/user/MistressRoulette

D/s Update:

2011-10-09T06:06:00.000-04:00

Several months ago, my wife put the brakes on the number of my blog posts. I am now limited to one per week. I found my posts moved away from personal accounts as might be found in a diary. Instead, since I had a week to think about each post I tended to author philosophical subjects with little to no account of my daily routine. Although I do enjoy vetting topics in that manner, I found I sort of missed the daily accounts too.

My last post was taken by a few commenters as an account of my current status-quo. Instead it was again a philosophical vetting of my views surrounding submissive neglect. In retrospect, I could see how that slant could be taken, but regardless I was going to devote this post to recapping my submissive role from a completely non-philosophical view.

My wife has successfully transitioned from unemployment into the position of High School teacher. For me the change has the practical effect of moving my wake up time to 4:40am. This gives me enough time to shower, and prepare my wife’s breakfast and lunch for the day. She comes downstairs at 5:40am and leaves at 6:00am. Also, when she comes home, she is very busy with grading, planning, and other school work. She works a lot of hours in stark contrast to her stint on unemployment. It lead to a period of submissive neglect feelings about a month ago, but my wife and I had a discussion and since then she and I have been working on finding new ways to incorporate D/s into our busy lives. Some my wife has been working on herself is to liberally express when she is angry with me, and even did so one time with a follow-up punishment. I had to write 150 lines of “I will do what my wife says”.

For my part, I have been staving off submissive neglect many ways. The one that seems most prominent recently is the effect from my home made PoI. I can’t wait for the manufactured ones to become available, but until then these work pretty good. I feel a countering pain during erections. My wife sometimes enjoys exciting me to cause the effect she knows I feel in it. I have to admit, the pain is a welcome addition to the bondage effect the chastity device provides. This is something I think only a submissive could understand. Perhaps there are some out there who could relate.

Another one I use on occasion is my submissive ritual. When I do it, it is at night and I kneel on hard tile while I hand write my rules by candle light. I wear binder clips as nipple clamps while I do. That adds quite a bit of pain on top of the hard floor tiles, but anyone who knows the effect of nipple clamps knows the pain can be endured until they are removed. Taking nipple clamps off is an amazing experience. As the blood moves back there is an incredible pain effect that is hard to describe. It is an exquisite feeling for a masochist and the good news is it never leaves any marks. Wonderful.

My wife tells me I should expect to remain chaste for six months. She finds if she keeps me chaste too long, I become a fairy. She has decided to enjoy me in pretty much permanent chastity with maintenance releases twice per year to stave off the inner sissy from taking over. I actually have no way of knowing if she ever chooses to forgo one of the semi-annual releases to let me suffer a bit or not. I suspect she may for fun once or twice. Time will tell.

Our youngest son is turning six this week. Our eldest turned eleven last month. My wife orchestrated parties for both, using me to do the work. She did bake the cake, but otherwise enjoyed using my serviced to order things according to her directions. It has been a fun few months under my wife’s authority.

Vanilla Wife / Submissive Husband

2011-10-03T01:30:00.000-04:00

I had a bit of a realization this past week. Myself and Mr. @AT, among others, often field criticism about topping from the bottom (TFtB). Personally have recognized this flaw in me long ago well before becoming an overt submissive and know it’s root. It stems from a flaw in character that makes feel the need to manipulate others due to some problems I had when younger. This is completely outside my submissive traits, but a personal flaw I know about. Since becoming an overt submissive I have found prolonged enforced chastity tremendously helpful and have authored several posts concerning that connection. However, even when in prolonged enforced chastity the subtle manipulation, although dramatically muted, never completely leaves. I believe I can honestly say I have found a new connection though. Let me see if I can put it into words.

If a dominant women chooses to use a crop on her submissive and tells him to not yelp or cry out, he may well be able to comply through internalizing the pain through masochistic pleasure. There will come a point where he will undoubtedly falter dependant on the severity of the strokes the women is applying.

A submissive man who is married to a vanilla women often lives in emotional pain. His desires for feeling the authority of a dominant women goes unfulfilled as his vanilla partner almost without exception, expresses herself according to her underlying persona. This vacuum causes torment and I feel be honestly described as emotional torture. I believe many submissive men who have been subject to this situation will agree. Masochistic pleasure can be used to channel this into a form of contentment, but just like the submissive man being whipped, he too will cry out when the emotional pain becomes too severe and in this case the form of his crying out will be TFtB.

What is being witnessed when Mr. @AT plays with chastity devices w/o Jane’s knowledge or I bring up my wife finding a boyfriend (or the too many other examples to list with submissive men who have accounted the same thing) is a submissive man being subjected to emotional torture crying out against his will to remain silent.

As an example, a few weeks ago I authored a post about feeling neglected concerning my submissive service. My wife is busy with a new job and also training for and completing a triathlon. I was rightly criticized by her and others for bringing to the surface forbidden fruit of my cuckold desires. She had shared a cuckold dream with me earlier, but had qualified the telling it to me with not bringing the subject up in response. I failed to maintain this requirement during my feeling of neglect. I was rightly at fault of topping from the bottom.

I am not justifying the fault, but do feel it is fair to compare it to the submissive man being beat who is told not to cry-out. There comes a point of pain where the body just reacts. So too with the emotional torture a submissive man feels who lives with a vanilla women.

For my wife and me the answer is honest communication. I admit my fault. She admits my neglect in catering to her vanilla tendencies in absence of my need to feel her dominance over me. Our most recent discussion was concerning ways this can be accommodated in her new very busy lifestyle, now that she is working so much. We seem to still be searching for a new mutually beneficial method which will allow us to again be content. I am now past my three week mark of chastity and I have that working in my favor too.

I wanted to put into words my thoughts as a means of expressing a truth I feel I have identified. I find the process therapeutic. I do think my having the previous flaw that tended me to try to manpulate others as a self defense mechanism actually prevented me from coming clean with the pain I was expirencing due to submissive neglect. I felt doing so would be a form of me exercising my manpulation skills and instead kept quite until the pain grew too intense. I feel other submissive men not burdened with being guarded against their own flaws would be more open with expressing their feelings of neglect. I do not and it feeds into a vicious circle. The answer I feel is to learn to be honest with my communcation. That is a learnt skill I am still working on.

Alternative Mediums

2011-09-26T05:28:00.000-04:00

About two weeks ago, my employer upgraded the cell phone they issued to me from a Motorola Q to an iPhone 4. A part of the reason why is a technical project I am working on needs the team to become familiar with the iPhone technology. We are soon to release an app in the iTunes store. I had no familiarity with iTunes and took some time to canvas what was offered and the underling technologies.

I came across many apps and other media in the initial searches I did. Among the many other subsequent searches, I also tried a search on ‘submissive’ since it is a personal interest of mine, but only found a few e-books for purchase. It seemed almost no content directed to D/s. I assumed it was due to Apple, Corp. doing content filtering.

Somewhere during a later search, I found the pod cast section. Searches there were much more fruitful. I found several D/s pod casts. There was one I was skeptical of due to the title ‘Diary of a Dominatrix’, since my wife chooses to shelter me from outside influences contrary to her views. My thought was it would be fictional accounts akin to erotic fiction. Instead the title is a bit of a hook to draw in me and my fellow perves. Contrary to my initial impression, the pod cast is produced by a precocious and talented dominant women who has a venture as a psycho-sexual therapist.

The content is principally intelligent articulation of the complex interpersonal situations commonly encountered in D/s contexts. The dialog includes mostly exploratory vetting of situations encountered between her submissive husband and herself. The unfettered vetting is not unlike Howard Stern's format, but in a D/s BDSM context. In addition to her submissive husband, she also includes friends who are in the D/s scene.

Her name is Mistress Roulette Chatelaine and listening to her pod cast has the effect of a cathartic similar to a psycho-sexual therapy appointment. Her degree is in psychology and the professional grade content is free. Her efforts in offering the D/s free content is noble. She supports the efforts by gaining visibility to her psycho-sexual therapy services, which she encourages the listeners to enlist her with for the fees she charges. The pod casts are free though and I do find them a worthwhile use of time. Although the content is a journey into their own self discovery, it is in turn also a mirror to the listener’s as well.

Mistress Roulette’s ‘Diary of a Dominatrix’ can be found in iTunes Pod Casts. She can be found on the internet at the below address and maintains an open e-mail which is available from her web-site.

http://www.mistressroulette.com/

Post Orgasm Submissive Duldrums:

2011-09-19T02:01:00.000-04:00

Well, it has been a few week since my wife gave me two orgasm in an attempt to stem my increasing leaning to things feminine. It seems to have worked. The problem is I still remember the enjoyment, so I cannot say it is like it was before. It is more like having dug up a bag of gold in the back yard. My wife help me burry it again, but now I know it is there. It is difficult to not tip-toe into the backyard for a peek.

Anyway, I have for sure been aware of contentious behavior returning since the orgasms. It started after about two days and has been around since. Also too, there is a noticeable alienation present between us that I fight against that was not there when I was in prolonged chastity. It is like I intuitively shy away in an attempt to remain on guard for some reason. I know from my own experience this is to be expected post-orgasm. I have also read many accounts of men expressing the same pattern. For me the Rubicon is right at the three week mark. That is not too much longer.

My wife has been busy with her new job as a high school teacher. Also, this weekend she left town to race in a triathlon in a city about four hours away. With her hands-off approach to me, I have been left pretty much on my own with my chores. She occasionally asks things of me, but her idea of a dominant act now-a-days is to put my hand on her hip before she goes to sleep. It feels a little like a lack of validation for all the work I put into keeping on top of the chores she has me do, but then again, that may just be the male bio-chemicals talking. Hard to distinguish.

Hopefully, I can pick myself up by the boot straps with some submissive rituals or something. We’ll see. I did have one nice thing my wife did. She shared a cuckold dream she had. I had my home made PoI on at the time she shared it with me and the combination of erection and pain from the PoI effect with the humiliation of my wife expressing enjoyment in the arms of someone else was a true delight. I was doing the ironing at the time and that morning was an easy one to find motivation for my submissive role to her. ;-}

P.o.I. - 2Mths Away

2011-09-12T02:30:00.000-04:00

Last week I got word from Ms. Nikki at A.L. Enterprises Customer Support that the manufacturing order has been submitted for the PoI (points of intrigue) that pair with the CB-6000 system. This marks the end of their engineering and testing phases, and now all that is waiting is the manufacturing in Asia to return the finished products. Ms. Nikki indicates about two months before they become available via the CB-6000.com website.

For those who do not know, the PoI were originally designed for the CB-2000 as a means of countering the common criticism of about 20% of men claiming to be able to pull out of the device. Also, they provide discomfort during prolonged erections as a means of discouraging that behavior in the wearer (click here to see CB-2000 versions). When the CB-6000 was released, there were not a set of PoI released with it and it was decided to follow-up with a later release. That time is finally about to arrive.

For me, it is something I am looking forward to. As someone who wears the CB-6000s in prolonged enforced chastity, the enhancement of the PoI are a welcome addition. I am between the #3 and #4 rings in size. The #4 is too small and the #3 is just a little too big. This cause quite a bit of daily slippage. I have experimented with adding rubber gaskets to fill up some space, but it would be nice to have the PoI apart of the design. Also too, I find sometimes I push erections against the inside of my tube for a thrill. Having the PoI help counter this behavior would be welcome as well. Discomfort as a reminder to behave is welcome to me.

While I was waiting for the PoI to be made available I tried using cable ties to make a sudo-PoI effect. I wrapped two cable ties near the guide pins around the base and rotated them to point down. Two larger cable ties ended up actually breaking skin, but I have found smaller ones work pretty well. I have three small ones pointed down on each side and have them in-between ones that are pointed up. This provides spacing for the cable ties that are pointed down to cause just enough discomfort to discourage erections, while not being large enough to break skin.

This whole concept is not a new one. There were well known similar devices during Victorian times called kali teeth. They came in many forms and were readily available to upper class men to help counter urges. It was seen as inappropriate for upper class men to have sexual urges and the Kali teeth were a common solution. The PoI are a direct descendent from this concept.

There is also the advantage of PoI wearers to be readily subjected to discomfort by their mistresses. All a women need do is excite the wearer and the discomfort will be experienced. The PoI come in different lengths to be able to control the level of discomfort felt in response to arousal. She may enjoy causing some discomfort in her submissive and keep him excited while wearing a PoI to easily cause this. There is really nothing that can be done to counter it and it is a very easy method of introducing this element to him.

It is my intention to wear the shortest one during the six month terms my wife has me on. Others may be directed to wear one of the two longer ones for short periods as either a means of punishment or SM playtime. It was common for the longer PoI on the CB-2000 to be used for a day or two of punishment. The short one being for preventing slippage. Look for them to be available for the CB-6000 before thanksgiving.

Inner Termoil

2011-09-05T04:04:00.000-04:00

The inner turmoil about feeling effeminate connections has continued to bubble this past week. As I mentioned in my last post, my wife and I had some back and forth about her feelings concerning my appearances and how that factored into her deciding to marry me. She does agree that I do fall on the more effeminate looking of men, but that was not really a factor. Instead, it was my caring characteristics which she was drawn in by. She still enjoys men who are tall, broad shouldered, and emanate confidence, but me not having those qualities did not keep her from wanting to have me as a husband.

Having this out in the open for the first time was very helpful for me to also come to peace with feeling effeminate feelings. It is clear to me these are surfacing in a more pronounced way then ever before as a residual effect of prolonged enforced chastity. As I also mentioned in my last post, my wife has found a job, but decided to keep me in chastity too. On the night she came home from her first day of work, she played with the lock on my chastity device. She knows I enjoy when she does, but then ended by looking at me and saying, ‘There, that is all you get’. She was letting me know her getting a job was not going to get me out of chastity and instead seems comfortable keeping me chaste for the foreseeable future. This is leaving me with the conflicted contentment that enforced chastity brings in fostering a non-combative and docile attitude, but also having left me with having to come to terms with living with effeminate feelings. This is not at all a homosexual expression. I have still zero attraction to men. My arousal comes from contact with women, visual or physical. I do feel confident in saying my sexual orientation will not change. I also can not deny the presence of feminine traits though. Some may see the two at odds, but I do not.

A lot of commenters have remarked about this by indicating my wife has expressly forbidden me and point out the several rules as indication. It is absolutely true my wife enjoys a masculine companion. I do not think I will ever loose the ability to fulfill that role for her. The rules though were written to counter overt submissive behavior common in new submissives as they attempt to flaunt their new role. I admit I was of fault for this and the rules rightly counter that behavior my wife found annoying. Those rules were not directed at countering these feelings. This I feel is a different situation. My wife seems to also and perhaps a new rule should be drawn up concerning expression of effeminate traits. What seems to be happening is my wife is allowing me effeminate expressions and enjoyment of feminine pleasure in a gradual manner. For instance, this past week she had me lie in bed and for several minutes seductively played with my breasts and nipples. There was not only the physical feelings of the erotic pleasure that comes from nipple play, but also the open enjoyment of lying there and being felt up like a girl. I moaned in pleasure through almost the whole time. The next morning I thanked my wife for doing so, and she let me know she wanted to do something for me that she knew I would enjoy.

Also this past week, my wife’s brother and his family came to stay with us to get away from the hurricane. My wife had some girl time with her six year old niece and asked me to come downstairs to check it out. She had freshly painted toe nails with blue glitter, lipstick, her hair done up in braids, and a rhinestone tetra with matching elaborate ear rings. My wife wanted me to express to her how good she looked and in truth she did. She sat at the head of the table for lunch like a queen at a banquet. It was obvious she was enjoying herself. I have to admit, when I came downstairs and saw her, a part of me leaped at the hope of being able to have the same done to me. My wife talked with me about it on Saturday after I submitted this post for her review. She decided to let me out of my chastity device for one or two orgasms and do so every six months. We felt this would help to keep these desires at bay and from becoming too pronounced. The chastity clock down below has been reset.

Forbes Magazine Report - 100 Most Powerful Women in the World:

2011-08-29T07:57:00.059-04:00

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http://www.forbes.com/wealth/power-women/gallery/

Forbes Magazine released its report of the 100 most powerful women in the world (see above link).

The countries of Germany, Brazil, Argentina, Thailand, Liberia, Costa Rica, and Australia have their leaders on the list.

The largest chunk were women in business. This list includes the CEO’s of such notable companies as Xerox, Kraft Foods, PepsiCo, HTC, DuPont, Archer Daniels Midland, Avon, Campbell Soup, Johnson & Johnson, HSN, and Yahoo.

Also notable mentions are the Managing editor of the New York Times, the President of Harvard, six self made billionaires in the US, and the former Speaker of the US House of Representatives.

Also this week, I came across a study indicating women prefer effeminate men as husbands (click here) and asked my wife if she agreed with what it has to say. She said that as a personal preference, she kind of did. She can say she does not enjoy living with a man who displays effeminate behavior, but she does also enjoy living with a man whose physical appearance is not overly masculine. She believes this is a bit of a fine line and too a matter of personal preferences.

I do know my appearance projects an image of naivety and simplicity. I am often thought to be much younger. It is the same for a few members of my family and I think it fair to say it is a genetic trait. When we first met, my wife found my hairy arms to be an indicator of me being hairy all over, but after a trip to the beach she found I was mostly w/o body hair. For her, excessive body hair would have been a deal breaker in a husband. Also too, being overly muscular. She likes a fit, tall, male but not one that is overly masculine (i.e hairy, hard features, etc.) On the other hand, she doesn't like a "pretty boy" either. Too much maintenance, she said.

This study indicates women find more masculine looking men to be ones with whom they would be likely to have one-night-stands during arousal times in their monthly cycle. For my wife she agrees that a tall, broad shouldered man does that for her during those times and also ones that exerts confidence. For a husband she was looking for emotional and personality characteristics and not really looking at physical traits. Although physically I am not her type, she doesn't find me unattractive either. It was really my receptive and empathetic appearance and personality which sealed the deal for her. I do know I have a more effeminate appearance then most men. Also too, my facial hair is much less than is common in my gender, which I think adds to this effect. I do think I fall into the class of men the study is refering to as more effeminate.

My thought was to see if this could somehow be tied to submissive traits, but my wife said ‘no’ and I defer to her guidance. I do feel though that openly acknowledging that my wife enjoys living with a man who has some effeminate physical traits is of enjoyment to her would be helpful. In our egalitarian times, this would have been something I would attempt to counter. Now, I feel it is something I can acknowledge and embrace.

The last thing of note that happened this past week is my wife successfully ended her unemployment by accepting a job as a High School teacher. She starts tomorrow (yeah her!!). I do not think I will be given a reprievefrom my chastity, as her initial time will be busy. There was a short back-n-forth last week about it and it was left that I should expect my chastity to remain indefinite and my wife will choose otherwise if she ever thinks I need an orgasm. My rules were altered awhile ago that I should expect to live in enforced chastity without orgasm (click here & note #4), and that is how I am looking at it from now on. It somehow feels appropriate to my station in the relationship. Plus too, with my wife's mostly off handed approach, it is one of the few ways she has found comfort in her dominant role. As such, I find I crave being denied by her as an expression of her dominance over me.

A servant in the service to the court of Catherine of Russia:

2011-08-21T07:21:00.001-04:00

I felt I wanted to document for myself what it would be like to live in service to the court of a female monarch and choose one of the most well known, Catherine of Russia.

She grew up well educated from an influential Prussian family and driven to become qualified to wear the Russian crown during her teenage years. She mastered the Russian language quickly upon her arrival in 1744 and converted from the Lutheran church of her upbringing to the Russian Orthodox. During her conversion ceremony she was given the name Catherine. She married in 1745 at Saint Petersburg at the age of 16 to Peter. Subsequently at their estate in Oranienbaum, both her and her husband enjoyed affairs. She became good friends with the sister of her husband’s mistress who introduced her to many powerful political groups.

Her husband ascended to the throne in 1762 and the imperial couple moved into the new Winter Palace in Saint Petersburg. Later that year, a political group Catherine had affiliated herself with successfully revolted against her husband and proclaimed Catherine the Empress. A few days later, her husband was killed. There was never any evidence of her complicity in his murder or the revolt that set off the events. Catherine was 33. For the next 34 years she reigned over the largest country in Europe and Asia.

Her reign is classically depicted as having furthered the evolution of Russian arts, economics, its foreign standing, and public education more so then any other before her. She was a highly intelligent, driven, and capable ruler. She also established a school for elite girls from noble backgrounds. It was the first school of its kind, called the Smolny Institute. She also worked hard at the establishment of a national school system, but was unable to complete the work. She did succeed in amassing all the necessary preliminary work to do so for her predecessor, her son Peter.

She took many lovers after her husband’s death and was known to be a generous benefactor to them. She was unapologetic about her sexual independence. Her children are in question as to who their father was. Catherine conceded in her memoirs she was unsure about who the father was with two of her children. She had suspicions, but was unsure.

It is unambiguously clear that the empress flaunted her sexual enjoyment as well as exercised her imperial power for her own interests. She is often referenced as a catalyst for women’s rights, even up to today. The rumors about her deviant sexual exploits are unfounded, but derive from her sexually independent behavior.

I did this research to try and imagine what it would be like to be a male servant in the court of the Empress. It is clear one would have to be impeccable in skill, as she lived her entire life in privilege and expected exceedingly high standards. Also it is clear, her enjoyment of a good looking man in her service may well have been used whenever she wished, without the expectation of reciprocal pleasure. These two things to me parallel my role in service to my wife. She does not reign over a kingdom, but does so over the household and has me in her service. I very much see myself as such a court servant and think it a fair characterization of how I can expect my life to proceed. It is a station which I strangely find I enjoy.

The Kumari:

2011-08-16T06:26:00.012-04:00

I came across an account of a goddess worshiped as an expression of divine feminine energy. The practice is in Nepal and the goddess lives in a young girl, similar to the practice of the worship of the Dali Lama in neighboring Tibet. As one who is keen to matriarchal veins in society, I did some research. I had known of the adoration of Mary, known to Catholics as ‘The Mother of God’. Also, of cloistered matriarchal communities in China, but had never heard of this practice. The girl is said to be the living embodiment of the Hindu goddess Durga, known in Nepal as Taleju.

What I found is the practice of worshiping a girl as a Kumari is common throughout Indian subcontinental countries. In Kathmandu, Nepal there is the best known of these, called the Royal Kumari Devi. She is a young girl who lives in the building known as the Kumari Ghar, right beside Kathmandu's Durbar Square. It is a temple built in the center of the city in 1757. The girl continues to live in the temple and worshiped as the goddess until her first menstruation when it is believed the goddess vacates her body until another is found. An accident causing a significant loss of blood can have the same effect. When this occurs, the search for who the goddess will subsequently enter begins, following a strict set of criteria and tests by the tantric buddhists of Nepal.

The goddess who lives in the girl expresses the divine feminine consciousness that is spread over all of creation. The practice of worshiping a virgin girl in this manner is documented to have occurred in India since about 300 BC. It is known to have been practiced in Nepal during the sixth century. There is surviving written accounts in Nepal dating from the thirteenth century describing the selection process of the Kumari. The Royal Kumari of Kathmandu is selected from a young girl within the Newari/Shakya community of Nepal. Often the mother of a girl will report a dream of a red serpent, which is indication her daughter should be tested for becoming a vessel of the goddess. The tests are a similar process to what is used in Tibet to find the reincarnations of the Dalai Lama. In the case of the Royal Kumari, she must possess the ’32-perfections’, which is a long list of attributes, both physical and interpersonal. She must also have an astrological sign and horoscope that fits certain criteria. The two most important personal attributes are fearlessness and serenity. Once selected, the young girl is taken by the priests to undergo secret tantric rituals to cleans her body and spirit of her past experiences. When completed, the goddess Taleju enters her and she is presented as the new Kumari.

This is a practice specifically of the Vajrayana sect of Mahayana Buddhism and apart of tantric teaching. Hindu faithful practice it to a lesser degree as well. Her following is almost universally accepted in the Nepal region. On Indra Jatra, in September, the Living Goddess in all her jeweled splendor travels through the older part of Kathmandu city in a three tiered chariot accompanied by Ganesh and Bhairab each day for three days. It is really a grand gala in which people in their thousands throng in and around the Kathmandu Durbar Square to pay their homage to the Living Goddess. Her life is spent in the Kumari Ghar palace, except on such ceremonial occasions. She always wears red, wears her hair in a topknot, and has painted on her forehead the symbol agni chakchuu or “fire eye”. Each year, the king comes to kiss her feet to seek a blessing. When the king and other petitioners present their offerings, if the Kumari remains silent and impassive, the wish is seen to have been granted and blessing given. If she stirs, her actions spell out the form of unwanted consequences, for which the priests are able to interpret for the petitioners. The Kumari, like the Dali Lama, has a large staff to attend to her every need. Her every wish is granted.

The matriarchal divinity is unambiguous. The goddess is seen to draw energy from the womb that created the universe. It is a purely feminine divinity. I was delighted to read about such a matriarchal archetype religious figure. To me it brought comfort. Living as an openly submissive man to a women, I can appreciate those who openly live under a feminine based religion too.

Chores Update:

2011-08-09T20:20:00.000-04:00

The discovery of so many chores has been a delight. Thank you Mistress Kathy for pointing out I spend too much time blogging. The change has opened up a whole new area for me with all the chores I have found to do. It is amazing how much there is to do when one looks for things.

My wife was away this past weekend. Amazingly I only watch TV for one hour. The rest of the time was taken up with chores and sleep. I squeezed in a submissive ritual too. Today I was able to tackle the filing cabinet. It has been neglected for over a year and needed attention. It felt good to do. Tomorrow after I finish with me evening chores, I hope to clean my desk. It too needs attention.

My wife let me give myself a pedicure last night. She does not consider this at all a feminine activity, as her father does his nails and she often sees men in the nail salon. I cleaned them and put on two coats of clear lacquer. I am proud of how they look and plan on continuing doing so on a routine basis.

All for now. Time for a submissive ritual.

Mr. Blue:

2011-08-09T19:58:00.001-04:00

Taking a page out of the Mistress Kathy book of suggestions, my wife has decided to limit my blogging time. I am now only permitted one post per week and not allowed to visit any blogs other then my own.

The reason for the change is my wife is fearing I am being subjected to outside influences leading to poor judgments. Last week, I asked her via a txt msg if I could try on one of her silk camisoles affectionately known between us as Mr. Blue, due to being made out of navy blue silk. It has silk ribbon shoulder straps, embossed patterning, and a ribbon lacing on the back (pictured above). It is quite a pretty piece and I thought it would go well with my blond hair and asked her if I could try it on.

My wife asked me if I sent the txt msg as a way to get her angry at me. I did some sole searching and have to admit that no, I do not think that was the case. I believe it was a simple desire to explore my feminine traints by wearing something that would look good on me. I felt the navy blue would go well with my blonde hair. I thought perhaps she would conceed me the chance, but instead it made her angry.

She became upset with me asking and it led to us having an evening discussion. Since then my blogging privileges have been curtailed and I am instead focused more on chores. I am thankful for this change and am delighted to find I have more chores then I had ever thought. It is quite easy to remain busy.

Also new in subservient husband’ville is a new rule my wife is trying out for a week to see if she likes it. I am not allow any form of entertainment of my own accord. If my wife is enjoying something, I am permitted to join, but not on my own. The exception is when my wife decides she wants me to go enjoy a TV show of my own or some other pursuit. It is her decision when and if this occurs. My wife said she enjoys expressing her nurturing side and granting me an entertainment privilege is a way she can enjoy this expression with me. I see it the same as the financial situation. I do not have access to money unless my wife gives it to me. Now too I do not have access to entertainment unless my wife gives it to me. To me it feels appropriate.

Also, my wife has agreed to allow me to spend free time doing a submissive ritual of my choosing. This is in lieu of entertainment and for me is comprised of several elements I find helpful to my submissive development. Also a routine submissive ritual is helpful in keeping my focus on service to my wife’s unique desires. I use a candle to illuminate my rules list while I hand write them on a blank sheet of paper. I do so while kneeling and with nipple clamps to add to the discomfort. I have only done so twice, but both times it was helpful in bringing me back to my submissive center after a busy day of work and chores.

Again, I am thankful for my wife permitting me this time to work on my development as her submissive. I do feel the sheltering of my wife/mistress increasing and as a submissive, it is a desire fulfilled.

Preface:
Society is shifting. Women, once relegated to secondary status, are now increasingly fulfilling roles of authority. Why this is occurring is a topic still under debate. My personal belief is women have innate abilities that simply make them better suited to leadership roles in a post-industrial society. Regardless of the reasons, objective government statistics track the changes through the Departments of Labor and Education. Both indicate female advancements trends which show no signs of slowing down. My personal favorite indicator of the change was the omission of the pledge to obey her husband by Kate Middleton from her wedding vows when marring a future British monarch. There are so many others. The fact that society is changing in respect to female leadership acceptance is hard to argue against. These combined changes are increasingly relegating to the past expectations of subservience from wives to their husbands’ authority. Mostly in place of the antiquated expectation is one of equality or egalitarianism. Societal expectations have increasingly shifted to this type of relationship dynamic. This book is written for those who instead embrace an openly subservient role of a husband to his wife’s authority.

Chp 1. Introduction
Chp 2. The Transistion Phase
Chp 3. 'Vanilla' Approach
Chp 4. Aggressive Approach
Conclusion

Chp 3. ‘Vanilla’ Approach:

2011-08-09T19:50:00.013-04:00

I do not have any statistics to back this up, but it is my experience that the vast majority of subservient husbands who have passed the transition phase find their wives enjoy this approach. The term ‘vanilla’ is used in the BDSM community to describe people who do not have kinks, which is the term used to encompass all the activities within the community. BDSM is a multilayered acronym which stands for bondage, dominance/submission, sado/masochism. The community often lays claim to the role of a subservient husband through the dominance/submission aspects, as the husband is seen as the submissive. However, the vanilla approach falters in this classification as the wife does not display characteristics commonly associated with a dominant.

Instead, the wife enjoys the leadership role and exercising her authority over her husband, but does so with an approach that would appear all too common to outsiders. In fact, many who practice this approach find it invisible to family and friends. All that is apparent is the husband often defers to his wife.

Women who find this approach preferable are ones who find they enjoy a docile husband, but do not enjoy control. It is often reported that women find exerting control to be an exhausting burden. In the next chapter, I will go over common elements in the other type of approach where the wife does enjoy the feeling of control. It is a personal decision which is preferable, but I do find more often than not this approach to be the one chosen.

Having successfully completed the transition phase, the demarcation of which is an ambiguous thing to define, the wife and husband now have left egalitarian principles in the past, and only work on countering the societal pull to follow suit with prevailing patterns. Perhaps one month, or even a year or more it may take to feel comfortable in marking the transition complete. The new roles of authority and subservience will be natural to both. Commonly during the transition, the wife had shed her participation in household chores and instead enjoyed her husband serving her by fulfilling them to her standards. Also too, commonly the relationship has settled into pronounced sexual disparity with both enjoying the new form of intimacy. There may have been a formal set of rules drawn up for which the obligation of the husband are unambiguously outlined. The husband has learned to look to his wife for direction and the wife enjoys directing her husband’s service to her in a manner suited to her unique tastes. A new trait of empathy has developed in the husband where he is able to anticipate his wife’s wants and desires. He feels pleasure living in her service.

Added to these common transitional changes, the vanilla wife may feel comfortable adding any of the following. This list is not comprehensive, as individual tastes are extensive. However, it does comprise the common elements in a vanilla approach.

Financial decision making: Some wives enjoy delegating to their husbands the obligation to pay the bills and maintain the household budget. Others choose to exclude their husbands from access to household finances. In my case, my pay is deposited into a joint account I do not have access to. On my payday, my wife transfers my pay into an account which is in her name alone. If I feel I need cash for something, I have to ask my wife. She enjoys the liberties of spending household disposable income in any way she chooses. Strangely, I enjoy seeing her do so.

Cooking: Often, men lack the kitchen skills necessary to prepare meals routinely. It takes a long time to develop the skills necessary, if they were absent to begin with. Women who practice the vanilla approach often enjoy directing their husbands to meal preparation according to their desires. It does not negate their enjoyment of spending time in the kitchen from time to time cooking or baking, but the bulk of meal preparation and clean up almost always is delegated to the husband.

Physical fitness: Women are known to be better at maintaining themselves physically. When there is a transition to the wife making decisions, often the husband is obligated to maintain a level of physical standards concerning his weight and appearance. This can be anything from generally working towards some goal, or a mandated navy seals training regiment. Regardless of the amount of demand, it is a very common element of a vanilla approach.

Male chastity cycles: As previously mentioned, the courtship behavior invoked while a man is kept chaste is very helpful in fostering a docile attitude. It also serves to elevate the husband's enjoyment of his subservient role. There is innate male biology which makes this a very real experience. The question of duration is one that is often debated. During my own transition, I was frightened that my wife would require long durations of chastity of me. It was something that gave me a great deal of trepidation at proceeding with the whole dynamic. I am now of a counter belief. I agree with many in the area that a subservient husband should remain without an orgasm more then three weeks a majority of the time. This means he should be permitted an orgasm at most once every six weeks. The three week mark has been seen to be when there is a pronounced change in behavior and attitude. As such, the wife is deserving of a husband in her service to be in this state the majority of the time. It is only proper. Further, I believe the chastity obligation should remain for much longer durations, as long as the wife finds no need to the contrary. If she is sexually satisfied without intercourse from her husband, then her husband should remain chaste. The birthday present is a common solution where a single orgasm per year is permitted. This again is something determined after the transition, but is a very common conclusion of women who practice the vanilla approach.

Sleep patterns and daily routines: Through the transition the wife will find a pattern to how she enjoys her husband’s service. Almost always, she will enjoy extra sleep while he is obligated to wake to ensure her morning meal is prepared. Also too, there may be any one of a number of additional services expected, such as after workout massages, evening tea, scented candles be lit, and the mother-of-all displays of authority, control of the TV remote. I will often bask in disparity massaging my wife’s feet while she in turn enjoys watching TV. It has become a common pattern of my service to her. I rarely watch TV programming of my own.

Women in a vanilla approach, rarely if ever, punish their husbands. Instead, they express displeasure through conversations and denying opportunities for their husbands to express their service to them. As we will see in the next chapter, some women enjoy more traditional methods of punishment as a way of helping their husband’s learn the type of service they desire. Again, it is a matter of tastes.

....back to table of contents

Chp 2. The Transition Phase:

2011-08-09T19:50:00.012-04:00

With the decision by both to try a relationship dynamic of the husband living subservient, the questions come what is appropriate, what has worked well for others, what are things to bear with caution, and is there a danger of going too far? In my view these are questions which deserve to be addressed in kind, but truthfully, the battle is all but won, as there are two parties endeavoring to achieve the same goal. Given this, the difficulties of transition are easily overcome.

Coming from an egalitarian situation, it is truly amazing how ingrained this becomes to our daily lives and what a daunting task it is to change. The wife must learn to become an authority and the husband must learn to draw direction from authority instead of instigate change according to his perceptions. The process takes a much longer time then beginners anticipate, as the egalitarian patterns are extensively engrained as to have become part of the very nature of the couple. Changing this is a daunting prospect and it should be openly acknowledged to be no small endeavor. In this way, the two will help each other grow into their respective new roles, by providing outside perspectives to each other. This being done with the open acknowledgement that the process will be slow for each to become accustom to.

If the husband is the one who suggested the change, it is likely he harbors preconceptions and will likely attempt to steer the wife’s role to accommodate his notion of what is expected. Unfortunately, this is an all too common cause for frustration, as the husband is still in a qusi-authority role and the wife finds she ends up taking direction from him. This arrests her growth into an authority role and her successfully formulating how she wants her husband to serve her, as she is instead doing things she feels she wants him to have her do. To alleviate this common encumbrance, it is recommended the husband refrain from several things during conversations with his wife during the initial transition.

1) Initiating sexual conversations
Since a man often finds a sexual connection to living subservient to a women, it is found to be best if he simply refrain from starting sexual conversations.

2) Starting sentences, “Would you like me….” or “How about if I….”
These are really him attempting to give direction to the relationship. Instead, it is found tremendously helpful to allow the wife to grow into her new role without the husband causing misdirection to her efforts in this way. Also too, the husband is well served in learning his new subservient role to instead wait to receive direction from his wife instead of attempting to instigate changes. This is a learned skill which is foreign to living under an egalitarian standard and takes time to develop.

3) Participating in planning free time
In an egalitarian relationship, a great deal of conversation is spent discussing how free time will be spent. Since this only serves to reinforce the previous egalitarian principles, instead it is helpful for the husband to learn to be led by his wife’s decisions concerning how free time will be spent. Two things happen here. First, the wife learns to follow pursuits she enjoys as an exercise of her new authority role. Second, the husband learns to enjoy supporting his wife as she follows her desires. Of course, there are times where mutual discussions are needed concerning the logistics of events. The principle of the wife deciding and the husband complying in this respect has been found to be especially helpful as it goes to counter one of the most pronounced ways egalitarianism is practiced in a relationship.

As with other recommendations in this chapter, these are suggestions that have been found helpful with the transition, but couples may choose to forgo following them if they wish. It is an attempt to pass along to couples new to the concepts some helpful ideas.

Another thing that has been found helpful is the husband refraining from orgasms. Depending on his history, this may be a daunting thought. Some men find going a week or more all but unthinkable. For those men, like me, there are chastity devices which are helpful where the wife holds a key to the lock which prevents the husband from orgasms. I wear one all the time, as without it I am not able to stay chaste more then a few weeks. For other men, this is really not needed, as they can refrain if directed to.

Having the husband refrain from orgasms is found helpful for several reasons. First of all, the concept of the wife enjoying sexual pleasure while the husband is withheld is a prominent way to display to both in the relationship their given roles. One being the wife free to direct things to her wishes and the other the husband living in a service role, being withheld pleasures and his own pursuits.

There are many ways a wife can direct her husband in this way. Sometimes husbands can have intercourse in a way the wife enjoys while remaining without an orgasm. Other men find this impractical as they quickly pass the point of no return into orgasm during intercourse. For those men, either oral methods or the use of other means the wife may enjoy work as well. For me, my wife is principally clitorally stimulated and since I am in a chastity device, our sexual times are one sided oral encounters. It has turned into intimate times we both enjoy as expressions of our respective roles.

The other reason keeping the husband without orgasms is helpful is it invokes what is know as courtship behavior. This causes a man to be docile to a woman he is attracted to and allows his subservient role to have real biological pleasure associated with it. There is very basic biology at play and men have been found to ride pleasure plateaus for days at a time while living a subservient life to their wives. It is a very powerful tool available to women and men to help in facilitating the transition.

As to chastity duration and the husband’s orgasm frequency, the topic will be discussed in following chapters. During the transition period, it is recommend that the principle of sexual disparity be put into practice from the very start, as there is such a pronounced effect. If the husband was on a pattern of frequent orgasms, it is probably a good idea to get a chastity device to help out. A good test is to see if he could go a week for starters and if so, let him have one orgasm and then try ten days. The real goal is three weeks, but there will be more on that later.

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Chp 1. An Introduction:

2011-08-09T19:50:00.008-04:00

Why would a husband ever willingly accept a position in a relationship with his wife where there was the expectation to defer to her in all matters? Could he be content and happy with such a situation? Would a wife be comfortable in the leadership role and overseeing her husband’s service to her? The answer is simple. The same could be asked in times past when it was expected of a wife to be subservient to her husband. The answer in both situations is ‘yes’. A subservient can feel content and happy even though their desires are being subject to their obligation of service. The service itself becomes enjoyable. Contentment in such a situation comes through the recognition of the service being of use. What makes this such a foreign concept is in this case the male is the one being relegated to the service to the woman. The principles are otherwise the same.

For many men, the pleasure of openly living subservient to their wives is being discovered. For me, the pleasure is very real. The enjoyment I experience is quite difficult to put into words, but I have crossed paths with many other men who have experienced the same enjoyment of the lifestyle. Also, as society continues to shift I have to believe this role will increasingly become common. In the case where the wife provides the sole income or where she is the breadwinner, the role of a subservient husband is easily justified. I do also see in relationships where the couple lives in a duel income relationship or the husband is the breadwinner or sole provider of income, the role of him being subservient seems less appropriate. I contend in any of the situations, having a husband subservient to the authority of his wife to be appropriate and a way to find enjoyable approaches to operate a relationship.

Male bravado aside, the life of service to the authority of another in replace of personal pursuits is one that has been in existence for most of human history. Even in ancient Greece, the birthplace of democracy, slaves outnumbered citizens five-to-one. The idea that everyone was to enforce their own view of their rights is a very new concept. In my view, it has the benefit of requiring open communication among the partners in a relationship. However, a tremendous amount of time and energy is needed while each tracks their own equality scorecard and determines how to communicate their view. Alternatively, the two equal partners can end with strategizing how to enforce their view of how things should be ordered through subversive approaches. This can and does often lead to unhealthy relationships as the two invariably end pitted against each other.

Much better is where one person in the relationship is understood to be in authority over the other, as has been the case through most of human history. Clear lines of authority provided societal structure. So too, in a relationship the same is true to provide the efficiencies of understood roles. This being the case, the question remains how a man can come to accept the unequivocal authority of his wife. It is increasingly common that men come to the realization themselves that it is an innate desire of theirs. This comes through personal introspection and self discovery. Once verbalized, it leads to men enjoying more pleasure in the subservient role then they had ever expected. The other approach is where a woman seeks to instill an enjoyment in her husband of living under her authority.

Both routes into the lifestyle require the couple to discuss a concept that is currently contrary to societal norms. As such, it is not uncommon for there to be difficulties from one of the two partners concerning their acceptance of the principles outlined in this book. I will not attempt to get between a couple in this discussion to argue one perspective or the other. It is assumed that the audience reading this book has already made the decision to embrace a relationship of openly accepting the women to be the sole authority. In this context, I am respectfully providing a compilation of experiences that have been found to be helpful as well as a reference into the lifestyle.

I decided to create sections for the different phases of the relationship. The first being transitional where the concept of openly practicing authority coming from the wife is begun. The other two are a vanilla approach and an aggressive approach. Some women after going through the transition find one or the other suits them and continue with it. Others find they go from a transition into a vanilla approach to then proceed to an aggressive approach. Where it goes from the transition is up to the tastes and preferences of the woman who has accepted the authority role. It is important to note, if the wife was the reluctant member during the transition, that she find a way that is enjoyable to her. If she simply does uncomfortable things to appease the desires of her husband, then she is really not in authority. In a round about way, he is. Instead, the wife must first identify her desires, and then set the relationship in order of her preferences. It is the bending to her will that the husband being subservient learns to put into practice. As each women is different, this is a customized structure that it is the husband's role to accommodate. A few hypothetical examples may be helpful in explaining.

In one case, the husband has discovered through introspection that he feels a desire to submit to the authority of his wife. He comes to her and summons the courage to express this desire which is contrary to societal norms. His wife likes the sound of it, but since it is contrary to contemporary expectations, she is reluctant. In the end, she decides to try the change, but finds she ends up heavily burdened with acting a part she is uncomfortable with in an attempt to appease her husband’s desires to feel her authority. She continues doing so even though it is contrary to her comfort and becomes increasingly alienated from feeling contentment.

Alternatively, is the situation where the wife finds she is right to assume the role of the authority figure over her husband and expresses her wish to him. They try to transition, but using some stereotypical approaches she finds the process awkward and unrewarding. The husband grows tired in a subservient role as he feels the situation unauthentic leading to an increase in tension and lethargy.

In both situations the essential ingredient missing is the wife first identifying her own desires for her husband’s service to her. Without this first step, the process of ordering the relationship is all but futile. Once the woman is able to honestly identify her own desires, it is a relatively simple matter of expressing them and finding a means of bringing them about. The husband in subservience will sense the necessary sincerity of his wife’s authority over him and therefore be content in his service to her. The wife will enjoy her husband’s service to her as it is fulfilling her honest desires and therefore lead to a contented relationship. Also too, since both know their roles in the relationship, the experience will lend itself to a much more harmonious daily routine then the previous egalitarian dynamic.

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Preface:

2011-08-09T19:50:00.007-04:00

Society is shifting. Women, once relegated to secondary status, are now increasingly fulfilling roles of authority. Why this is occurring is a topic still under debate. My personal belief is women have innate abilities that simply make them better suited to leadership roles in a post-industrial society. Regardless of the reasons, objective government statistics track the changes through the Departments of Labor and Education. Both indicate female advancements trends which show no signs of slowing down. My personal favorite indicator of the change was the omission of the pledge to obey her husband by Kate Middleton from her wedding vows when marring a future British monarch. There are so many others. The fact that society is changing in respect to female leadership acceptance is hard to argue against. These combined changes are increasingly relegating to the past expectations of subservience from wives to their husbands’ authority. Mostly in place of the antiquated expectation is one of equality or egalitarianism. Societal expectations have increasingly shifted to this type of relationship dynamic. This book is written for those who instead embrace an openly subservient role of a husband to his wife’s authority.

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Chp 5. Conclusion:

2011-08-09T19:49:00.004-04:00

Some find the lifestyle scary. Some find it exciting. Since it is currently opposed to societal norms, it is often hidden. The truth of the lifestyle is it is wholly natural and will certainly become more commonplace as society continues to shift. The suggestions in this book are meant with sincerity to help with facilitating transitions in other couples who have decided it is for them too. Also, this is a reference for general information on relationships with the women in the authority role and the man as the subservient.

It is my hope, those who read this will find it helpful. If nothing else, it is an account of others who practice a lifestyle that you may have thought completely void of people who contemporarily practice. The lifestyle is not only openly practiced, but appears to be gaining acceptance. A women able to brag to her friends that she has a subservient husband is becoming a sort of status symbol that acknowledges female advancements. Men can now walk into any rest room and find a baby changing table available for them to provide child care. The signs that this lifestyle is openly practiced are all around, and I hope you will find it of comfort to know you too may enjoy the benefits the lifestyle offers.

Chp 4. Aggressive Approach:

2011-08-09T19:49:00.003-04:00

A husband who has transitioned into a contented subservient role will be glad for any expression of authority the wife is willing to provide him. Women who enjoy explicit control often express their authority with a stern stance. This is not to say they are not loving and appreciative for their husband’s service. On the contrary, they do very much, but have found they enjoy a strict method to display their authority. Since the wife is displaying her authority in a way she sincerely enjoys, the husband finds contentment being subjected to what would be considered by an egalitarian couple as completely inappropriate.

Following are several common elements to the aggressive approach. There are many others, but these are a collection of what I consider to be the most common:

Objectification: This practice is meant to deliberately display that the husband will be used as a tool and unquestioned obedience will be expected. Some methods of objectification are to require debasing activities such as licking of the bottom of shoes, being called by a toy name, required to sleep on the floor, and many others limited only by imagination. Other common ones are requiring the wife to be addressed as ma’am or some other title with the husband keeping their eyes on the floor when being spoken to by their wife. Some go so far as to require their husbands kneel anytime they are being spoken to.

Spanking: The most common punishment technique, the methods and varieties have a long history. There is the ever popular hairbrush. One new twist to this one is to have the husband lay a leg across each side of the lap of his wife who is seated in a chair, with his stomach to the floor and head facing away. In this seated position, the wife has an easy job of applying the strokes. Others are the switching (AKA caning) where a thin piece of wood is used to apply the strokes. A switch from a birch tree is well known to be one of the best. The reason spanking is such a popular method is whatever marks are left are always subsequently covered by clothing, leaving nothing for outsiders to see.

Lines: The writing of a phrase repetitively is also a very common approach to deter poor behavior. For instance, an infraction of a given rule will lead to the rule being required to be hand written for a given number of times in perfect script. Some put a time limit on the completion and if not completed by the end of the time given, it need be restarted.

Forced feminization: For a heterosexual man the requirement to wear women’s clothing or act in a feminine manner is a tool which allows him to become free of pride. This has been a very common approach used to improve the attitude of a prideful husband. The result is often found to be one who finds a life of service surprisingly enjoyable.

Cuckolding: This is the practice of keeping a husband chaste while enjoying a boyfriend. It is different from an affair or cheating, as the husband is purposefully made aware and participates in the secondary relationship. For instance, he may choose the clothing for the wife to wear on her dates, or be introduced to her boyfriend and instructed to thank him for taking his wife out on a date. It is a surprisingly common practice, but one that takes open acknowledgement from both the wife and husband that it is agreed to as well.

Permanent Chastity: Many women have expressed a liberating feeling once telling their husbands they will never be permitted another orgasm. Some do so by having the husband throw the key to their device into a body of water. Others apply adhesive to the lock. It is seen as a marker into permanent servitude. Surprisingly, often the husband encourages the decision.

Collaring: Probably the most commonly practiced display of a submissive in the BDSM community is the wearing of a collar. Often the collar is locking. It can be made of leather, iron, stainless steel, or any other material, but the symbolism is well known. It tells others that you are the property of someone and any correspondence with you need go through them. There are elaborate collaring ceremonies that have developed concerning the practice. Almost all collars have rings to which can be attached a leash or a means of binding the submissive in a given position.

It is my experience that women who enjoy the feeling of control and peruse the aggressive approach end up settled on only a few of these. For instance, one women in an aggressive dynamic may enjoy cuckolding and permanent chastity, while another enjoys spanking and line writing. Another may enjoy forced feminization and spanking while another uses cuckolding and collaring. The ones that women in aggressive approaches end up using are ones they find they enjoy the controlling effect of best. Also, it is very common for women in a vanilla approach to on occasion experiment with one of the approaches from the aggressive. Sometimes this leads to a women deciding to change from a vanilla to aggressive, and other times it is just a one time trial.

Women who enjoy the feeling of control that the aggressive approach provides tend to also have more extensive rules for their husbands. Women using the vanilla approach are appreciative of their husbands being docile to their requests, but otherwise acting has they had been before the transition in their daily encounters. This includes a hands off approach to their husband’s personal decision making, with the exception of the expectations that have been agreed to. A women who enjoys an aggressive approach instead enjoys the opportunity to dictate more regimented behavior and forms of her husband’s service to her. The distinction may be between women who are Type A and those who are Type B, from the classic Jacob Goldsmith theory. Type A are those who are business-like, competitive, and controlling. Type B are ones who lack an overriding sense of urgency, are patient, relaxed, and disengaged. This seems to explain why some women find they are comfortable in a vanilla approach and others enjoy the aggressive approach.

Some may consider the elements of the aggressive approach inexcusable. The counter to this is really quite simple. All were common during patriarchal times in converse. In fact, many are still openly practiced in patriarchal situations as such. For instance, in some Islamic cultures, a single man may have many wives, akin to cuckolding for women in authority. Another example is the wedding ring. It was originally only warn by the bride, and put on her finger at the time of marriage, symbolizing her servitude to her husband. This is very similar to the symbolism of collaring. Spanking too was once seen as acceptable to administer to a wife when she misbehaved. The parallels are unavoidably clear. As society shifts, I find it only natural that these same things seen of benefit in patriarchal times be found to be useful and enjoyable by women in authority over their husbands, if their personalities find it so.

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Mr. Blue:

2011-08-07T16:07:00.006-04:00

In Defense of Male Chastity:

2011-07-27T07:18:00.002-04:00

The concept of chastity to foster a docile attitude in a submissive man seems to be being brought into question. This is simply baffling to me. The concept that boy is horny. Girl makes him wait to get him to do something she wants is a pattern that has been around for time immemorial. It is well know that a boy/man in this state is docile to the women. There is primitive biology at play. The basic concept that this is useful in a D/s F/m context has never really been of question in my experience, until recently.

I have been blogging for quite some time. I have noticed since my chastity cycles have become semi-permanent and I have actively advocated the practice that the attack against the concept has grown in volume. The instigators are men who are hell bent on doing everything in their power to counter the concept. In my view, it is an easy method to a healthy D/s relationship to curtail the corrosive effects male orgasm cause.

There have been other bloggers who experimented with prolonged enforced chastity. I do not know of but a very few who do go so far as to recommend it a general practice, as I do. I was once terrified with the concept. I now am on the other side of the rabbit hole and can see a different perspective. Men kept chaste are much less combative, manipulative, and are just plain content. This is well known. For a submissive man, it is desirable to encourage such a status-quo in order for their service to be enjoyable. It is a gift to them to enforce extended chastity, as they are freed from the internal fight that male orgasms cause and instead are freed to enjoy the pleasure of submissive service.

To others who may question the concepts, it is always healthy to look at previously accepted ideas in a new light. I just can not believe the concept of using sex to control a man is not readily accepted. It is a concept so basic to human existence and human history to be almost defining as who we are as a species. I for one still exist as a proponent for the concept that a submissive man should be kept away from sexual pleasure and thereby enjoy the pleasure of his service instead. This is in his best interest, as well as his domme’s.

Vetting via Blogging:

2011-07-25T14:53:00.005-04:00

I am not quite sure how to begin this post, as it is concerning something I am not quite sure how to put into words. Part of the reason for putting it into a post is to go through the exercise of doing so. It is concerning my masculine side or lack of.

In prolonged chastity, I can truly feel it slipping away. I am not sure if those are the right words though. I remember hearing on the Howard Stern show one time that men who have prostate surgery become ‘nice guys’ afterwards due to the lack of chemicals that cause aggressive behavior. I know from my experience that I am best kept chaste in a D/s relationship. If I was in an egalitarian relationship, male orgasms would be fine as they would help with me standing up for my turf. In a D/s relationship, it only causes difficulties and it is in my best interest for it to be withheld. Ms. Rika says the internal conflict male orgasms bring is a useful training tool to force a man to be in internal torment as a form of obedience training. For me it is a brutal experience that, although orgasms are highly enjoyable, the contention they cause in my post-orgasm behavior makes it almost not worth it for me. The frustration of sexual denial is definitely the lesser of two evils. Also, sometimes in extended chastity there is the feeling of being on the cusp of an orgasmic experience that lasts for days. There is too the sexual satisfaction I get from my wife enjoying herself sexually. Knowing she does is somehow sexually satisfying for me too. This too is a very difficult thing to put into words. Mr. L2S described it in his post concerning his cuckold desires that a woman enjoying herself sexually is just so hot for him. It is the same for me. I enjoy my wife enjoying herself sexually and the knowledge she has done so (whether by cuckolding me or having me do it to her) is reward by itself. It negates the need to feel orgasmic pleasure myself since I know she has got to and has chosen to keep me withheld. For me, it is a situation that makes me feel at peace, content, and my role as her submissive being openly acknowledged.

Back to the topic of the post as I feel I am avoiding the subject. I have to be honest and admit. I do now occasionally consider myself in a feminine way. Perhaps that is not the best way to describe it. I do not have orgasms and am best kept without them. Instead I enjoy being my wife’s bitch around the house and getting her off by giving her head. Over time in this situation has definitely decreased my masculine feelings. I can sense the change. I sometimes look at the nice clothes my wife wears and wish I had something more attractive to wear too. It comes from a desire of mine to get her to use me sexually. For instance, last weekend, I took a shower before going to church and got dressed up in some tight fitting kaki pants without wearing any underwear. I put on some cologne and brushed my teeth really well, using mouthwash. My wife caught on and stopped me to squeeze my ass and be flirtatious with me. Later that night, it didn’t amount to anything, leaving me a little let down. I find myself aware of my appearance in an attempt to entice my wife to use me for her sexual pleasure. I know this is me becoming sexually objectified, but I do not care. It feels good doing it. I also know sexual objectification is a very common female submissive desire. I think that is why I associate my desire as being partially feminine. To be honest thought, I just do not know. It is a difficult feeling to put into words.

Let me see if I can explore it this way. My penis is no longer a sexual organ, for me or for my wife. My wife has never really found much, if any, enjoyment from it and now that she is getting off regularly without it there is simply no need. This leaves me sexually in-between masculine and feminine. Sort of a-sexual, or as a eunuch. Emotionally, I do sense extensions into feminine traits, but still recognize some masculine ones. For example of some of my new found feminine traits are emotional sensitivity, enjoyment of nipple play, desire to attract through subtleties in appearance, sexual objectification, comfort with emotional vulnerability. I am straining to put these into words, but I think those are accurate descriptions of the feelings.

I am hopeful my wife will recognize and encourage these distinctions. She was raised in latin America and is completely opposed to x-dressing. I do think she is open to other aspects of gender identity play, but I am not sure. Perhaps she would be willing to occasionally slap my behind and tell me ‘good girl’, or otherwise treat me as more of a girlfriend when we are hanging out together. This would be as a form of embarrassment or as an open acknowledgement of my having developed a feminine sense. At least not treating me as a guy who she needs to let bang her. That is no longer me. I am something different now. There are lots of guys who could fill that role for her if she ever wanted, and I would enjoy if she did.

This post was very difficult to author and may take a few more attempts to get my thoughts around the feelings. At least this was a first step.

Socital Shift - Report from Time Magazine:

2011-07-24T07:04:00.004-04:00

The current issue of Time cover story reports on a shift in gender roles that has been occurring over fifty years. The article is chock full of Pew Research studies, US Census Bureau official statistics, academic studies, and published sociologists on the subject. All agree that when women first started to enter the work force in mass back in the 1970s there still remained a deeply ingrained ‘gender norm’ where the brunt of domestic work was still being done by women. A popular term ‘Second Shift’ was used to describe a working mom who still did most of the domestic chores when she got home from work.

Slowly by slowly, this deeply ingrained gender norm has been chipped away at. The studies now report men are doing three times more child care as in 1965. Further, statistics on duel income couples from the Department of Labor Statistics indicate men had a combined work load of 8hr. 11 min and women 8hr. 3 min. This is the amount of paid and unpaid work done on a daily basis, which includes domestic chores at home. The two values are statistically equal.

The second shift woman with a lazy husband are no longer the socital norm. There has been a statistically measurable shift in gender roles. Men have been slowly doing more and more domestic work. This equal fulcrum point where we now sit will not be a stopping point. I believe inertia will continue and soon studies will show men being expected to do more and more domestic chores with women being expected to hold a leadership role in their relationships.

CLICK HERE to read the whole article by Ruth Davis Konigsberg.

24/7 Service Submissive:

2011-07-21T21:13:00.003-04:00

Mr. Elle from the Obedient Boyfriend blog, authored a short post about an exchange he had with his dominant, Elle. He was putting his thoughts together about when, as a submissive, it is appropriate for him to stand-up for his point of view (PoV). It was a short post, but it seemed to have touched off a rather spirited debate over the topic.

When a man gives a women his gift of submission, it will almost never lead to him becoming a ‘Stepford Husband’. The real world just doesn’t lend itself to adults becoming lobotomized in that manner. As adults, we are still needing to approached the complexities of life on a moment by moment evaluation, the same as the rest of the adults in our society. Our distinction is the women in our lives hold authority over us.

This can exhibit itself in too many way to even attempt to describe them all. Each women is unique and her desires for her authority role differs accordingly. We submissive men are obligated to adapt to their desires for us and learn to be content in feeling the authority from them. We are still intelligent adults who actively participate in our families and society at large requiring evaluation on appropriate interactions in given situations. Giving a gift of submission does not change this obligation. Simply added to it is the additional obligation to constantly defer to the women in authority over us, be it a wife or girlfriend.

Back to the post where Mr. Elle seemed to question when it is appropriate to readily defer and when he should provide his personal PoV. His girlfriend, Ms. Elle, did a wonderful job of bringing clarity to the matter. Her answer,
‘It depends.’

I find this statement to be so true. It is part of the reason why a D/s dynamic brings two people closer together. There is a bond between a domme and her submissive that is not present between a couple in an egalitarian dynamic. The D/s bond is an intimate experience that makes her submissive transparent to her and teaches him to key off what she enjoys. This moment by moment evaluation keeps his attentive service to her unique to her own desires. Learning to know a domme’s boundaries as intuition is the life long job of a man after having given his gift of submission.

This impulse has taken me a long time to develop and is still a work-in-progress. I am very proud of my progress so far. For instance, tonight as I was serving my wife dinner at the family table, I noticed her pajama shirt was on backwards. I knew my PoV would be valued, and quietly whispered in her ear indicating what I saw. I did so quietly and respectfully, as to maintain my station in the relationship, but knew she would simply want to know. Other times, I do recognize it is best to hold my PoV as it is not being requested. Knowing my place takes a long time to recognize and even still is a moving target as my wife grows in her dominant role. The two of us are bound together unlike when we were living 50-50. There is really no comparing the two.

For 24/7 service submissive men, life is not akin to being lobotomized. On the contrary, your wits will need to be sharpened to be successful in your service to your domme. It is a life of work, effort, and obligation. In return, your domme agrees to let you watch her enjoy herself and lead you into the service she desires of you. It is your bending to her will where you find contentment. I have found it much more wonderful then I had ever imagined it could be and am so glad my wife accepted my gift of submission.

Matriarchy Comes To Hollywood:

2011-07-18T07:07:00.005-04:00

I have come to the personal realization that I believe women to be superior to men in many ways that modern society is placing a premium on. I therefore see it imminent that women will fill the leadership roles in our society that once men were expected to hold. This has already begun to happen.

The united states supreme court was just appointed another women justice. Our current secretary of state could of very easily been sitting in the oval office instead. The next presidential battle is looking to have two women battling for the republican nomination. The list can go on and on for a long time. I do know this is a topic that causes others to react strongly. My view is one that women are superior to men in aspects modern society values and will therefore become societal leaders with men being relegated to secondary roles.

My wife agrees with me in general. As a woman, she and Ms. Ayesha rightly have the view that significent disparity still exists. They both point out even though there have been strides made, just simple equality is still distant, let alone outright matriarchy. Still, as a submissive man I am encouraged to see mile markers in our society's march into matriarchy.

For the first time in my memory, a full length feature film is being released with the topic of female leadership at its core. There are many strong leading women in films. Infact Netflix has a whole catagory for such films. I know of none that deal with matriarchal situations, until now. The new film stars Christian Slater and Eva Longoria (OMG she is HOT!). It is called 'Without Men'.

Although the film is shot in a satirical setting, the audience is left with the question, ‘Would the world be a better place if run by women?’ It is scheduled to be released in select theaters July 29th.

CLICK HERE for review;

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6-Mths

2011-07-15T20:05:00.029-04:00

I have noticed my clock has clicked to six months. The last time my wife let me out of my chastity device for orgasms was on my birthday. I am indecisive and conflicted about my chastity continuing. I have been in this indecisive state for many months and have more or less grown acustom to it. I very much want out to orgasm, but the frustration that prolonged extended chastity brings is satisfying to my submissive traits. Plus, there is the added benefit of my behavior being more appropriate for a submissive man in a marriage. Here is a previous post I did on the topic.

I use to masturbate several times per week. My wife and I would have intercourse perhaps a few times per month. I do not have any qualms with this pattern for a man in an egalitarian dynamic. The contention that male orgasms breed is actually conducive for him standing up for his turf. In a D/s dynamic I feel that attitude should be curtailed. Prolonged enforced chastity is an easy way to facilitate this and I do recommend a trial for other couples living in D/s relationships.

My wife has given me indication that she has no consideration on the matter until she starts her next job. Do I think I could go another six months? Considering my history, I can not believe I am writing this, but ‘yes’ I do. In fact I even think it may be good for me. As I wrote though, I am indecisive and conflicted about the matter and am now subject to my wife’s decision about it. My sexual frustration is a gift my wife has given me and I am grateful she has seen fit to provide me with this means to cultivate proper service to her in my role as her submissive.

Below is a link that sums up well how I feel. It comes from the FemDom Fantasy Blog;

CLICK HERE

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Dominant Wife:

2011-07-11T20:16:00.040-04:00

Living as a submissive is a continual learning process. I find it second nature to tune into my wife’s wants and desires and it is almost a form of intuition by now I seemed to have developed. Not quite 100%, but I do try. As she explores new areas, I find I bend my service to what she may be desiring. Recently, she has been kind enough to express her dominance to me in clearer ways. The difference has been distinct.

For instance, she has shown glimmers of sadistic behavior with me. Albeit brief and fleeting, she will tease me to acute arousal to enjoy the glint of torment it brings to me. When she does, it makes me feel embarrassed and slightly humiliated. She has said she likes it when I feel this way and has found it something new she has come to enjoy.

Also, she has shown surprising liberal use of expressions of her anger towards me. This is something she never use to show comfort with, but has done so on several occasions recently. When she does, I feel the impulse to thank her for expressing her anger to me. I had always felt she should when she felt reason to do so, but she never really did, save for once ever blue moon. Recently, it has been several times per week. I am thankful since her expressing her anger to me is a way I can correct something that is preventing my service from being enjoyable to her. I find abject acceptance of her anger and readily admitting fault to come natural. It is still a work in progress for me, since her readily expressing her anger to me is a new form of interaction that I am still becoming accustom to. I do find it appropriate to thank her for doing so. To me it seems right.

In extended chastity, I find living in passive service to my wife to be where I find contentment. It was not the case when I was given relatively frequent orgasmic privileges. I think the absence (or dramatic decrease) in my attempting to steer things has opened for my wife the opportunity to grow into her dominant role much more so then if I was making it difficult for her to learn on her own. The key has been enforced extended chastity. I am unable to maintain chastity for extended durations, and my wife has provided me the enforcement to my chastity commitment. This too I am thankful for as it provides a means of my service to be enjoyable for her. This is the goal I crave and the contentious behavior that my orgasms create gets in the way of reaching this goal.

Dominance is defined as, “Overlooking and commanding from a superior position”. My wife is superior to me. I am thankful for things she does to help me remember this truth. Things like delegation of chores, keeping money that I earn withheld from me, having me kneel in her presence, and many others are ways she provides me reminders of her superiority over me. Again, these are things I am tremendously grateful for. It is my tendency to forget that my wife is my dominant partner. I do well being submissive to her. The meager service I am able to provide her leadership in the relationship is but my small part. My obedience to her and my gift of service submission to do with as she may enjoy is what I offer. Her willingness to use this is a gift she provides to me as a way I can enjoy my submissive pleasure. It is the cultivating in her husband the enjoyment of submissive pleasure (to the absence of other pleasures) that makes a dominant wife successful, as the husband is directed into a life of contented service.

Submissive Househusband:

2011-07-11T06:54:00.003-04:00

My wife enjoys keeping me nimbly enjoying doing household chores. This of courses, frees her from the need to do so, and also provides her a great deal of leisure time. I think it is fair to say, she has grown to enjoy seeing me burdened with chores. I too enjoy being her househusband. I always have. During my stealth submission days, it was the principle way I pretended to be her submissive.

Today, I can say I enjoy doing household chores. This is amazing to me. Who would of thought a pleasure could be found in such a life. When I say pleasure, it is not just enjoyment. There is real physical pleasure involved and as such, it is something I seek to repeat. Even sitting here writing about it is causing my body to react. My wife provides me these opportunities through obligating me with chores. It is a sort of gift she gives me.

Saturday morning, I woke and emptied the dish washer in the kitchen. I then started in on the weeks ironing. I had left it out in the kitchen the night before. I felt an amazing amount of disparity pleasure while I did the ironing. It felt wonderful.

Many cross dressing submissive men have joined my blog. I have been wondering why. I am not at all condescending of cross dressers. In fact it was brought up as a suggestion a few times, but my wife has no desire to lead me in that direction. Still the number of followers and commenter who are overt cross dressers is hard to go unnoticed. I think what we share is this pleasure in role reversal situations. The pleasure is very real. It is not at all uncommon for me to get to the point of dripping pre-cum while doing laundry or some other chore. It is a pleasure I seek to experience through disparity situations where I am overtly relegated while my wife is unencumbered. Times when I realize this is the case cause an enjoyably reaction in me.

It is totally true that I live in a role reversal marriage. My wife enjoys liberties and our sexual relationship is focused on things that bring her enjoyment. This is exactly what a man would of expected in a patriarchal situation. Going out golfing and then coming home to a clean house and the wife willing complying to his sexual desires. In our case it is the same, but the roles are reversed. My wife has command of all the household income and does so with it and her free time as she feels she would enjoy most. I look forward to opportunities to do chores in service to her and opportunities to bring her sexual enjoyment.

The term ‘role reversal’ is common to describe this as well as a ‘submissive househusband’. I too like the term ‘disparity pleasure’ at the recognition of disparity in the relationship causing me submissive pleasure. Living a life of chastity, obligated to do household chores while my wife enjoys free time and sexual enjoyment is a wonderful way to live. It provides levels of pleasure I had no idea existed.

Chastity Captions:

2011-07-10T06:55:00.025-04:00

CLICK ON IMAGE TO ENLARGE:

I also author for Mr. Indy @ Indecisive Captions (CLICK HERE)

Return of an Old Friend:

2011-07-07T22:46:00.006-04:00

A.L. Enterprises - Points of Intrigue (PoI)

In response to a customer support inquiry, A.L. Enterprises told me the ‘Points of Intrigue’ will be re-introduced this fall. The PoI are a security enhancement designed to prevent the 5% of men who claim to be able to pull out of the device. It also has the effect of causing discomfort during prolonged erections. The tips are dull enough to not cause any skin to be broken, but are designed to cause enough discomfort to discourage prolonged erections.

I find I sometime spend time pushing erections against the inside of the tube. I have been looking for ways of countering this behavior and had known about the PoI for previous models from A.L. Enterprise (i.e. CB-2000, CB-3000, & The Curve). There was no scheduled release date for a PoI for the 6000. It was just responded to as being under development. This is the first time a release date for the 6000 version of the PoI has been given.

For the previous versions, the cost was less then $20. It seems a no brainer to include when getting a kit. I find I still need some training to discourage pushing erections against the inside of the tube and look forward to getting my PoI set to help out. ALE-CS says this will now be available for 6000 models starting this fall.

A Word From Our Sponsor:

2011-07-04T11:18:00.002-04:00

I have been apprehensive about responding or writing anything on my husband’s blog for several reasons: 1. It’s his blog, his thoughts, and his safe place. I read it most of the time and have learned to take the information from it, not as suggestions, but as a map of his mind. 2. There are a lot of judgmental people out there. One would imagine that a blog is the one place where a person can put his/her opinion out there and have it respected as such, but it sometimes feels that there are people who read blogs as a way to attack others and tell them how they are wrong – this is not the definition of a good time to me. Some of the themes/topics discussed are quite personal and are part of an intimate journey between two people, and to have it dismissed or attacked can be hurtful, even if it is done by complete strangers that do not have any say in what we do or do not do.

Having said that, I was asked to give my opinion on our relationship. We had a “regular” relationship for the majority of our marriage. I have always been the leader, but we discussed things and to be honest with you, it would be exhausting. Sometimes I felt like he knew that what I proposed was the best course of action, but that he needed to make the point of having a discussion to feel equal. Chores were the same thing. For every chore he did, I needed to match him. Taking care of the children had to be done the same way – no matter how the day or night had gone. If it was my turn to take care of the kids in the afternoon because he did it in the morning, it didn’t matter if I had a bad day at work – he wouldn’t help because he had done it in the morning already. That is just one example, but it sums it up.

The D/s relationship came as a surprise to me. After so many years of fighting for equality and his turf, the change was quite unexpected. As a Hispanic woman, I did not know what to do with the information. He suggested books and websites, but the Dominatrix aspect turned me off. It was a struggle for a long time.

When we found the Ms. Rika book, the whole concept made more sense to me and I was able to a) believe that the relationship could be any way I wanted it to be and b) I didn’t have to follow anyone else’s idea of what we were doing right or wrong. What worked for us (especially me) was what was right.

I still think that I am in a learning journey. As I change, I discover things that I can move to, and others that I never thought about that I would appreciate. Still, there are things that bother me:

1. The thought of a lover – I took my wedding vows seriously. I don’t want to have anyone else in my life but my husband – no matter how much he would like for me to have one. It’s not going to happen. Ever.

2. Physical discipline – This is one of the ones that I won’t say “never” to, but at this point, with small kids, the thought of hitting my husband is not appealing to me. Also, I haven’t been able to disassociate the thought from a parent/child” dynamic, and I don’t want another child. Having said that…

3. Too submissive – I want someone that I can lean on when I am feeling weak. I lead the relationship, I accept his submissiveness, but I am a woman, and sometimes, I just want someone to help me in moments of weakness.

4. The chastity device – what can I say. I know he likes it. I know he needs it, but sometimes, seeing it makes me feel that he is not in control of himself and that makes me feel like he is too weak (see #3). I am learning to accept it, but if I have to be honest with myself, I sometimes wish that it wasn’t there. Now, this doesn’t open the door for everyone who reads this to question Sub-Hub’s desire or admiration for the device. I for one, appreciate what it does for our relationship and how well it works for him. It is my gift to him. Plus, sometimes I wish it wasn’t there so I could tease him.

5. The total responsibility can be scary – When I am the only person who makes ALL the decisions about everything, I am the only person who can be blamed for the wrong choices. This includes our budgeting, our children and even the relationship. Sometimes, in the back of my head I wonder if my decisions will ruin the family in the long run. To fix that, I have given Sub-Hub a “voice” role. If he senses danger, he has a responsibility to tell me. I still make the final decisions, but his opinion is still and will always be treasured.

That’s it (I think). Not too bad. Like I said, this all comes naturally to my husband, but I am still learning. I appreciate and love the gift of submissiveness that he has given me. Our household is more relaxed, the children are more relaxed.

When I was recovering at the hospital last week, the nurse said to us: “You should take advantage of this time and have him treat you like a queen.” My response to her was: “He already does.” I can’t deny that I felt a surge of pleasure when I looked over and saw my husband looking at his feet… blushing…

Side Benifit:

2011-07-01T06:32:00.003-04:00

My wife mentioned last night about how it didn’t seem I was getting many comments any more on the blog. I said it was probably because I was not bloging about anything controversial. When I do, I see a spike in comments. My driving motivation to blog is a means of getting my thoughts into words. That way, it is a mental exercise I do in service to my wife and she gets to keep tabs on my sub-space. Also, it is encouraging to cross paths with others who can relate to my situation. That is always refreshing too.

One other way I could probably see an increase in comments is if my wife would participate in a post. I find often a dominant women’s input to be helpful and wanted to post something she could speak to. My thought was the side benefit of a husband in enforced chastity.

My wife is free to enjoy herself during our evening’s together as she wishes. Often, I give her nude massages, focusing on an area of her body she would like me to. She can feel at ease knowing I will remain chaste. Also, she has the leisure of not having to be concerned about the effort it would take to satisfy my sexual urges. It is a marital obligation she is no longer encumbered with spending time and effort devoted to. Instead she can enjoy directing me in ways she enjoys herself.

For instance, last night we lay in bed talking about the days events and the upcoming weekend. She asked for my help in typing a follow-up e-mail to her contact at my employer. I was nude at the time, but since I was locked, there was never any sexual context to our time together. Just a devoted companion spending pillow time with her.

The principle reason for keeping a husband in enforced chastity is the dramatic decrease in contentious behavior and to help foster a docile attitude in him. There are several side benefits as well. Liberties to enjoy personal indulgences is a primary one in my view.

If anyone has questions for my wife, you are welcome to ask. I am sure she would be glad to respond.

Time Draws Near:

2011-06-30T06:23:00.004-04:00

When I offered to have my chastity commitment remain during my wife’s unemployment, I knew I was probably in for more then three months. Finding a good job just takes a lot of time. Now that my wife is close to closing the deal in one or two positions, I am wondering if I will be let out.

My guess is initially, my wife would choose to keep me locked until she gets familiar with the new routine of her working again. Then again, it may lead directly to me getting my key back. It is complete speculation on my part.

Life locked in chastity is not all bad. I do recognize I have become docile. There are clearly changes in my behavior from when I was unlocked as I am able to remain chaste for the longer durations that I wasn’t able to before. It is clear to me that an orgasm leads to contentious behavior from me that I am unable to prevent.

Seeing this and also recognizing living as my wife’s submissive is just how I am most happy gives me the satisfaction knowing she has the privileges that come with the dominant role. For me it is rewarding when she uses me and keeps me chaste, even though my liberties are removed and I live sexually frustrated. I find it paradoxical and very difficult to put into words.

I guess I will find out if the key will be forthcoming when she lands a job. She agreed it was a good idea to keep me chaste at least until then. After that, she said she would let me know. I do not know how to say it well, but I do recognize that extended chastity is the right medicine for me and in a strange way, wish she would decide to wait for my birthday to make it a full year and then keep it an annual event. It is a very difficult thing to explain.

Working Dominant:

2011-06-28T06:48:00.010-04:00

...click on image to enlarge

I do have the feeling my wife’s unemployment is going to be ending in the next few weeks. Back when she was working, I always got so hot with her coming home from work and me being there to help her relax. She would often go exercise after work and then when she came home, expect her dinner prepared and the evening chores tended to. I would always enjoy doing so.

It is a wonderful feeling being a submissive husband to a working woman. My wife possesses natural beauty and she wears professional clothes well. They look fantastic on her. I also look forward to when she lets me go down on her after she gets back from work and an exercise routine. Often, she would have me massage her and then bring her to an orgasm before going to sleep. I would sleep through the night with the desire to serve still forfront when I awoke the next morning. It is wonderfully satisfing.

During her unemployment, I still have strong desires to serve her. In fact, I think it is just as strong since I know she is in a difficult space and I deisre to be of use. It is different though helping during a crisis then being a working house-husband to a working dominant women. Both are enjoyable, but differnt feelings for sure.

As the dominant in the relationship, working again has the practical benefit of increased income and professional satisfaction at being back in the work place. For me, I look forward to the change in my service that being a submissive to a working woman brings.

Wife's Birthday:

2011-06-27T08:15:00.002-04:00

Yesterday was my wife’s birthday. I had zero budget due to the expensive repair needed for the family mini-van and made due without.

Before my wife woke up, I had the children make her home made birthday cards. Sometimes they are better then store bought ones anyway, since the children are able to convey themselves on a blank slate. I prepared home made waffles.

During the day time, the children and I cooked a home made chocolate cake. We had decided that would be what she would like the most. My wife is known to be a chocolate fan. I found a recipe where we had all the ingredients and didn’t need to buy anything. It took about two hours, but turned out well. I also brought the children to pick some field flowers and by the time dinner rolled around, we were ready to surprise her with our efforts. She really appreciated it all and commented how good the cake was. I think it all turned out well considering.

My wife is convalescing for a spell after her surgery. She is in pain often and we are told that will be what is expected for a few more days too. After that, she is limited in her activities for about an additional six weeks. The heart rhythm problem that was causing her a battery of frustrating symptoms seems to have been corrected. At least she has that to look forward to after her recovery.

The family mini-van has been repaired and we are again a two car household. I spent the afternoon on Saturday washing both cars inside and out. A transmission repair is costly. My wife found a mechanic who did the repair for much lower then the dealership, but still it was a large unexpended expense. Since my wife is at the tail end of her job search, it was a repair we could ill afford, but had little choice. Now we are hopefully looking at having the mini-van for well after it is paid off. It will be a dramatic reversals when the monthly payments end, as long as no large repairs are needed. The payments will end in less then a year and is something my wife is looking forward to putting in the past.

In this space while my wife recovers, there is little in the way of D/s occurring. She spent most of the weekend in her room munching on advil. Still I am locked in enforced chastity and responsible for all domestic chores. My wife has grown expectant that I will remain chaste to curtail my disruptive behavior and compliant to her wish that I do the domestic chores of the family. These have remained unchanged during this difficult time and if anything has even become increased expectancies of me.

Boiled Down WLM:

2011-06-24T18:59:00.004-04:00

The idea that a wife will lead a marriage is one that has not gained popular acceptance. I find because this is contrary to societal norms, it tends to become a hidden type of lifestyle. I believe this causes defense mechanisms to protect the dynamic from ridicule. I find this unfortunate, as it makes for contention as the defensive reactions occur more frequently then would otherwise if the dynamic were readily accepted. The net effect is a prevalent reluctance to enjoy the mutual benefits a D/s F/m has to offer as well as causing those who do enjoy it to be overly reactionary.

I feel at its core, a WLM is simply an agreement that the husband will do more then his fair share of domestic responsibilities. In exchange, the wife agrees to be a little bitchy and flirtatious with her husband to satisfy his cravings for dominance. The wife enjoys liberties and the husband enjoys new levels of intimacy through a submissive channel previously unavailable.

This is easily hidden from outsiders, as is most often the practice, and often the power exchange is forgone due to being contrary to societal egalitarian standards. I feel Ms. Rika does a wonderful job of articulating the concept to transitional couples. She does so much better then I could, as her experience in the BDSM community stretches over twenty years. The successful transition of couples is lined with complexities and ripe to introduce fear when attempted in a vacuum. Luckily, Ms. Rika took the time to author a work to assist. Her book is truly a gift.

I do hope the WLM relationship dynamic will continue to gain acceptance. I personally feel it will do so as our society continues to move away from a patriarchal standard. The signs are everywhere that it is in fact doing just that. Yesterday, I was in the cardiac wing of a hospital. There was one male surgeon and one woman. The rest of the staff were women, save for a sole male. The pharmacy staff, the RN’s, the medical technicians, were all women. One guy from maintenance came up to fix something or another, but otherwise the healthcare on the cardiac wing was being provided by women. Amazing. This would have been unthinkable twenty years ago and outright ridiculed thirty years ago. Today it is accepted and becoming expected. I find it only natural that this will translate into change in expectations for relationship dynamics also.

Until greater acceptance of a WLM dynamic occurs, we are left with an overly defensive community and reluctance to transition. The concepts are simple and well known. There is really nothing complicated in my view. Men can be content living subject to their wives. The wives can enjoy liberties in exchange for placating their husbands with intimacy through a submissive medium from acts of dominance and enjoy a relationship otherwise ordered to their whim. A simple course more bitchy and slutty then would otherwise be natural is the cost for a contented docile husband. Seems easy, simple, and a win-win situation. Unfortunately, since it is contrary to egalitarian expectations, it is still mostly hidden and seen as somehow undesirable. It is my hope more are able to enjoy the immense pleasure a WLM provides.

Procedure Day:

2011-06-23T07:10:00.003-04:00

Well today is the day my wife goes in for pace maker surgery. Our youngest is away with my wife’s parents and I have taken the day off of work. She needs to be at the hospital about ten and will be staying overnight. Assuming everything goes well, she will be home tomorrow morning. As a low risk procedure, the insurance only allows a 23 hour stay.

When the decision was made, my wife and her cardiac surgeon had the discussion and I was only asked if I had any questions at the tail end of the conversation. My wife’s surgeon is a women and to me it was encouraging to sit in a room with two women who felt comfortable sidelining the man while they made the decision about the procedure. Our society has come a long way.

Anyway, my wife is slated to be ouchie from the procedure’s incision and needs to limit her exercise routine completely for three days after and partially for three weeks after. Past that, she may resume normal activity. Apparently the procedure is routine and all but common practice for rhythm problems. My wife is younger then forty. Using a pace maker at her age is not at all uncommon anymore. The one thing she can not do after is get an MRI, but otherwise no ill effect.

My wife said she is giving me the key to my chastity device so I can have a spat of a heathenistic vacation while she recovers. I am sorry. I said that wrong. My wife said no way was she going to give me the key to my chastity device. She was thinking about doing so for Father’s day, but since she was needing me on a short leash this week, that idea quickly passed as an option for her. I am not sure, but I am expecting being kept locked well past when she starts her next job. That could be a month or turn into even longer. She does seem fine leaving me locked as she can see the difference and likes it better that way.

Speaking of my wife's job search, my wife has two positions she is in the final stages of consideration for. She is hopeful one of the two will break in her favor and is actually glad it has taken this long. The delay has provided her a space to get the pace maker done. Keeping me chaste all that time didn’t seem to bother her at all. In fact, she lost track of the key. I asked for it to make a ring adjustment last weekend and she did find the key, but it took about ten minutes of rummaging to do so.

I am hoping my wife a speedy recovery since her birthday is this weekend. My eldest and me are going to do some preparations tonight during her hospital stay. We have no budget due to the transmission repair of the family mini-van, so everything will be home-made. The Martha Stewart web-site is a good source for home-made ideas. We will see…

In The Storm:

2011-06-21T07:44:00.000-04:00

It has been a tumultuous few weeks....

Last week after my mother left, we had the transmission die on the family mini van. There was also the enjoyment of a roof leak developing during some severe weather. The leak seems to be able to be addressed with some caulk, but the transmission repair is a financial burden we can ill afford at the tail end of my wife’s unemployment.

My wife will be having a pace maker implanted this week. Her cardiac surgeon recommends it to correct some problematic rhythms she experiences. It is suppose to be a routine procedure, but still an invasive process that will see my wife in recovery for a spell. Her physical training will have to be limited for about three weeks after, but the surgeon says otherwise she will be able to resume normal activity.

To say this is not a difficult time would just not be truthful. At the end of this week, my wife has a birthday. At one time, my wife had provided me a budget to arrange for her celebration. The transmission repair has removed that option and instead my wife has opted for a rain-check celebration. I still intend to do for her as she deserves while she recovers and to mark her birthday in the best way I have available.

I find part of being a submissive in a relationship, is learning to do the best with what your dominant provides to you. It is something I find I am thankful for being given direction from authority. When times are tough, having an opportunity to provide service to assist is very fulfilling. Also too, it is opportunity to feel the authority of my wife, as she provides the direction necessary to overcome the challenges life has put on our path.

Ms. Rika Interview:

2011-06-17T23:25:00.004-04:00

Hello,

Ms. Rika has a new interview posted on the internet.

It can be found by clicking HERE. Enjoy.

-SH

Glue for the Lock FICTION:

2011-06-17T07:37:00.003-04:00

My wife and I have a unique relationship. Awhile ago, she found some internet sites about living as a dominant wife. I have always deferred to her. She is very beautiful and I guess I considered myself lucky to be with her. I gladly agreed to the changes she made and in truth found the submissive role I seemed to take to naturally. I actually enjoyed it a lot.

A big part of the change was my wife no longer let me have sex with her. I was fitted with a chastity device to keep me from having any orgasms at all. My wife had me give her oral sex a lot though. Sometimes two or three times per day, but most of the time only once or twice per week. I have not had an orgasm in over a year and a half, but I found when my wife had me get her off, I felt enjoyment too and that has become for me how I get satisfaction.

I got ready for bed in my usual manner by undressing and getting under the covers. My wife preferred me nude while in bed. She was reading in her kindle but after I got into bed, she put it down and reached over to the night stand. When she turned back to me, she was holding a tube of super glue.

“This is for the lock of your device. I have decided to make it permanent. I use to live my whole life trying to get you to bang me. Since I changed things around, I realized I like you chaste and want to make it permanent.”

Without waiting for a response, I watched as she put about three drops in the keyhole of my lock, sealing the lock from ever being undone.

My wife lightly blew on the lock and looked up to me with a seductive stare. It caused an immediate erection, as much as could happen in my chastity device. She could see my response and smiled.

“See, I knew you would like that.”

She began to lightly rub her nails on my stomach, encouraging my arousal more.

“I am also going to find a boyfriend. I want a sexual relationship with someone who is able to satisfy me the way I want. I will still let you go down on me, but only after my boyfriend has me first. Until I start a relationship and it becomes sexual, you will not be between my legs anymore and then only after my boyfriend has me first. You will get to see how much he enjoyed me from what he will have left. I think that is going to be your new role.”

I had not spoken a word. It had to be true that I was a real submissive. What normal guy would not protest as his wife super glued him into permanent chastity and told him she was going to flaunt a relationship with someone else. For me, it actually felt good when my wife was dominant to me. It caused me to feel warm and a little bit blissfully numb. It is hard to describe the feeling exactly, but for me, it was something I had grown to look forward to, and with my wife, it happened a lot.

True to her word, I was not directed to bring her to orgasm at all anymore. She got a gym membership and started to workout after work. She often came home about nine or ten, when she would ask me about what chores I had done after I got home from work. She was starting to look very fit and sexy from the working out and also began to wear more seductive clothing. Her blouses were an extra button lower and her skirts cut a little higher.

One night as I was putting her sweaty exercise clothes to wash, she came up behind me and grabbed hold of the back of my shirt. I was pulled towards the bedroom and pushed to the floor at the foot of the bed. My wife positioned herself at the end of the bed looking down at me and undid her pencil skirt. I saw as she took it off she was wearing no panties and she spread her legs invitingly. I needed no further queue and began to gently start giving her oral sex. I tasted right away seamen. I knew from times she had made me swallow my own what it tasted like. My wife put her hands behind my head and pushed my face deeply into her. She was being very forceful while I continued and it kept going for about a minute.

“That should do. Wash this skirt too”

My wife ended it without me bringing her to an orgasm. I always like doing so and being denied the chance was a clear sign of her dominance over me. I was now going to be relegated to cleaning her new boyfriends seamen from her, and nothing more.

Later that night, we lay in bed nude talking about her new boyfriend. She was like college girl talking to her roommate. She told me everything and was all giddy at having a new boyfriend. She was really happy. I too, was excited for her that she found a way to enjoy herself so much. I was warm with submissive pleasure as we chatted like two best friends.

Transition Back To Normal:

2011-06-14T11:08:00.014-04:00

As any man who has warn a CB-6000 knows, the brass pad-lock will make a click as it swings and bumps against the plastic of the tube. This can be easily countered by using a rubber band to hold the lock in place. I did so while my mother stayed with us to prevent a bewildered stare and an awkward situation. There is a subtle question of comfort that the absence of the rubber band provides. Also, there is an element of humiliation the occasional click provides. Without a rubber band, I need to think about how I move. For instance, I can not run up or down stairs. It would click a lot if I did. Also, when I am in my pajamas, I need to move a little more deliberately to prevent clicking. The combination of comfort and caution have me preferring to go without the rubber band. I was glad to be able to take it off again subsequent to my mother’s departure.

Yesterday, the family mini van had a breakdown. My wife provided the oversight to arrange for it’s repair. I first called for a tow-truck to take it to the local dealership. I filled out the information on the outside of the key-drop envelope and will discuss it further with my wife when the service center calls me back. There is always the option at a dealership to trade-in if the repair is too costly, but my wife’s current unemployment may keep that option off the table for the time being. Anyway, while my mother was here, she left us with a financial gift to help during my wife’s unemployment. That can be directed to the repair. My wife expressed her frustration to me in a little submissive treat by teasing me that it was my fault the van broke and now she was not going to have the extra money. I thought that was nice of her to take some time to make it a D/s moment that she knew I would enjoy.

My wife mentioned last night after I gave her a massage and brought her to orgasm that she may have lost my chastity device key. She also said she was just too disinterested to spend any time looking for it. It gave me a moment of panic at the prospect of being permanently locked. After that passed, I have already been about six months locked. We are half way through the year. The prospect of staying so for what seems to be a much longer time puts me in a weird conflicted state. One side wants out to enjoy, but my subservience to my wife falters and our relationship suffers contention. On the other side is the enjoyment of sexual frustration and the pleasure I feel when I bring my wife to an orgasm. Those are sufficient substitutes. Plus, my submissive service to my wife is clearly more in line with her desires for my attitude when I am just kept chaste. Regardless, I do not have the decision anyway and being subjected to my wife is an indescribable enjoyment for which I am grateful she extends to me.

This morning I caught up on some blog reading. Mr. John has about the best post on real life lifestyle D/s that I have read in a long time. It is on his blog I am SubmissiveProud and is an interview format. Very good read about the difference between someone who is just playing with D/s and those of us who are in the lifestyle.

Busy Weeks:

2011-06-13T10:44:00.005-04:00

My mother’s week long stay has ended. She said what a wonderful time she had, how clean the house was, and enjoyed the cooking she was served. The D/s elements between my wife and me, kept us argument free too. My mom did notice my wife wears the pants in the family, but didn’t mention anything. She respects those kinds of interpersonal relationship boundaries. I remember reading a long time ago about Mr. 4-Ever Hers living with his in-laws for several months. There too, the true D/s aspects of the relationship were easily hidden.

With my wife’s family, she is much more liberal with her dominant stance over me. She tells me to clean their oven and wash dishes without hesitation while we are at per parents house. With my mother, she was more reserved. The dynamic is just much different between a daughter-in-law and her mother-in-law, and my wife felt it best to maintain my subservience out of view while she was staying with us. It was easy to comply.

As we were going to sleep last night, a show was on where a husband killed his wife when he found out she was having an affair. My wife turned to me and asked me to not do the same to her ;-}. I would probably bake her and her boyfriend a cake, I would be so glad she decided to have an affair. Her best friend did so with a construction worker several years ago and it caused a great deal of problems for her. It led to a seperation from her husband for about a year. I would hope my wife would feel free to enjoy an affair if she ever chose to, knowing she had my complete support. She has said she has chosen not to, but future circumstances can never always be know and at least she knows my love for her will remain with my blessing to enjoy herself that way, should she ever find herself in the same situation as her friend, knowing I would encourage her to enjoy herself.

The children start summer camp this week and my wife has several job interviews too. I am looking forward to again practicing overt submission. I find I have missed doing so this past week.

Prison Cell:

2011-06-12T11:21:00.000-04:00

As a submissive man, the act of being locked into a prison cell by a women has strong appeal to me. Being lead into the cell and then having the door close and locked as she walks away free and I am left confined is a concept that is analogous to a D/s relationship.

On one side, the submissive is kept confined. Freedom is absent and the submissive is helpless but to wait to be unconfined. They are subject to the will of their dominant and without a means of escaping their confinement. The feeling of an institutional system at a dominant’s command brings with it the authority and the futility of resistance. I think the abject surrender of a man being locked in a prison cell by a women is the connection I draw the most from. Crossing over to complete surrender to my wife’s authority several years ago was this same kind of feeling.

On the other side, the women leads a submissive man into a cell. She recognizes his compliance and his willingness to be subject to her. As the door shuts and she locks him away, she has the assurance to know where he will remain until she decides otherwise. The feeling of freedom she feels as she walks away knowing that her freedom is unique to her is what makes it taste more sweet. She may place the key to his confinement in a drawer or keep it on her. Either way, she can dismiss her authority persona and enjoy a pursuit of her choice, knowing she need only return to find her submissive again willingly compliant to her direction.

The image I think has a wonderful analogous representation to D/s relationships. I wanted to put my thoughts on the concept into a post to explore putting the feelings into words.

Following A Suggestion - FICTION:

2011-06-09T23:19:00.020-04:00

Until just a few weeks ago I would of never of thought about doing what I did, but here is how it came about...

My husband bought me an electronic book called “Control Your Submissive Boy” about a month ago and I started to read it during slow moments at work. I came to a suggestion that I could keep my relationship with my husband as D/s and also have a normal guy as a boyfriend. The book said my husband would enjoy if I did. The idea was foreign to my upbringing, but I had to admit, it caught my interest. I thought, could it really be that easy?

I sent a txt-msg to my husband’s cell phone reading “Horny. Panties wet.”

He responded right away, “Wish I were there.”

To test to see if the book was right, I sent back, “Maybe I will just find someone here to take care of it for me.”

It took only seconds and I read, “I am sure you could. You are a beautiful woman.”

I wanted to make sure and responded, “You would like that, wouldn’t you?”

“Yes” came back in only a few short seconds.

The book was right.

I teased him a little more with txt-msgs about doing it with a guy at work and I could tell he really wanted me to. I read on in the book and there were some further suggestions about having your submissive husband give you oral sex after a date with a boy friend. It said he would like to clean up the guys seamen that way. The thought captivated me. The image of my husband between my legs licking another mans seamen out of me set off in me something I could not explain. I wanted it and have him experience my dominance over him in that way. I knew he wanted me to and found I was really getting my panties wet by thinking on it.

Just then, I was startled back to my surroundings when a co-worker came over. The guy was always polite, but I often caught him sneaking looks down my shirt. He started to ask me a question about a project he was working on. There was no doubt. I was hot and wet. I found my hands going to my shirt and I undid the top button while he kept talking. My shirt already was cut low, but the additional button undone, opened things up even more. His eyes drank in the view and I held still while he looked. He had stopped talking and his mouth was agape a little. No one was around and I stood to close the gap between us. I took his hand and put it in the opening of my shirt and said, “I’m hot. I want you”.

I couldn’t believe I said that, but it seemed natural and I couldn’t seem to stop myself as his hand reached into my bra to cup my breast. When he began to play with my nipple, moans of pleasure escaped from me and it became hard to keep standing. My boss was out of town and I walked him into the empty office where there was a couch.

We finished about 4:15. I had came twice and had held him tight as he released inside me. I knew what I wanted was still waiting at home. We cleaned up and separated with a kiss before getting on with the end of the work day. My drive home was rushed. I could not wait to tell my husband to give me oral sex. He always liked when I told him to and had gotten quite good at getting me off. I only let him have an orgasm about once a month or so. I had several per week. This time though, he would be doing so while I was still leaking from the afternoon with my co-worker.

I came through the door. My husband was dutifully cooking dinner, as was his job to do. He also did all the housework. I briefly acknowledged him, but was in a daze in anticipation. I made my way up to the bedroom and took off my jeans and underwear. I was still wearing the pink office shirt that had successfully enticed my coworker and called for my husband. He came up in only a second. Seeing me sitting on the edge of the bed without my pants, he knew what I wanted. I felt the seamen start to leak. My husband closed the space between us and kneeled down between my legs. I felt his tongue touch and I gasps leaning back. It felt wonderful. I regained my composure and wrapped my legs around his neck and looked down on him as he seemed to enjoy cleaning the seamen. He may of just thought me wet of my own accord, or maybe he recognized the difference. He did not give any indication, but feeling him lick me clean was a wonderful thing for me to enjoy. Not only was there the sexual feeling of being stimulated, but also the satisfaction of finding a way D/s was enjoyable for us both was something I was looking to do for a long time. The book was right. This was wonderful.

As he began to bring me to climax, I was debating telling him. Just before I climaxed, I decided to keep it to myself. I seemed to enjoy that thought more and released into an intense orgasm after which, his mouth slowed and ceased.

“Good job. You can go finish dinner now.” and off he went. That was wonderful. I knew I would be doing that again soon.

Nipple Play:

2011-06-09T06:16:00.006-04:00

My mother is staying with us for the week to participate in our youngest’s graduation from kindergarten. As such, the D/s interactions have been muted between my wife and me. My wife gave me a treat on Tuesday night by playing with my breast and nipple for about twenty minutes as we were going to sleep. It felt AMAZING!!!! Several times, soft moans of pleasure could not be held back.

I am going to try to put into words the feeling. It was an erotic connection for sure. It felt like erogenous pleasure that built each time she brushed against the nipple or played with it. Also, I felt vulnerable as I layed still with her hand on my breast. The whole experience was very enjoyable to me. I let my wife know the next day and she told me it was a treat she extended to me to compensate for my mother being around preventing other things I enjoy.

I know many other submissive men enjoy when their wives treat them with nipple play. It seems just about everyone I have crossed paths with has enjoyed it. I had never really much had the chance, but the other night was wonderful. I think too the sensation was amplified from being kept chaste. Since I am with-held orgasmic pleasure, I think my other erogenous areas are more easily aroused. Whatever the reason, it felt incredibly good.

New T.V. Show:

2011-06-07T07:22:00.001-04:00

http://tlc.discovery.com/videos/police-women/

There is a new program I have found, called Police Women of Broward County. In the show, women of authority and power, who all look very sexy, drive around town in uniforms putting handcuffs on bad men. The deputies are; Officer Julie Bower, Shelunda Cooper, Andrea Penoyer, and Erika Huerta. All are confident women who weild firearms and look terrific in their uniforms.

I am not sure why I am drawn to this program, but let me take a stab in the dark. The image of an authoritarian women to me causes a response that I enjoy. I recommend the program. It is very exciting. Check your local programs guides for TLC. I set it to record on my DVR.

Life in a Cage:

2011-06-03T12:12:00.016-04:00

To many people, the thought of living life while in a chastity cage is an unthinkable prospect. Too daunting for consideration, let alone trying the process out. I think the whole thing is blown way out of proportion due to psychological overstating our self gratifying culture imposes.

For instance, many, many people go through their day wearing all manner of jewelry and piercing. One man I work with has a lip piercing he never takes out. Even a common wrist watch has more weight then a chastity device, and can therefore objectively be said to be more cumbersome. The difference with the chastity device is the mind game it plays, and therefore the reluctance at the unproportionally perceived detrimental effect. This is in spite of the well known benefits a submissive man experiences while kept chaste.

Let me see if I can draw an analogy. When presented with the prospect of making a dentist appointment, it is very easy to come up with reasons to not call. Too busy, distracted, simply forgot, phone handset weighs eight hundred pounds… However, it is known to be in your best interest to go. It only takes thirty minutes for a cleaning. It often takes more time to cook breakfast, but the dentist chair conjures up discomfort, therefore there is a psychological game that occurs in finding reason to not call.

With a chastity device, I find it is the same. The actual cage is light weight, simple to wear, and unencumbering to daily life. It simply provides dominant women a means of looking after their submissive men in a practical way. However, I find there is a dentist chair mentality when it comes to putting one on and handing over the key. No such drama exists when one reaches for a wrist watch and puts it on. That act is done without second thought.

Living caged is in my best interest, as it makes me docile to my wife’s authority. There is clear bio-chemistry involved. Beyond three weeks, a noticeable change occurs. I have given my wife the liberty to choose duration and encourage her to enforce extended chastity on me. She seems perfectly happy to do so, as it is helpful to her leadership of the relationship to keep me chaste. I do think this obvious outcome is often clouded by excessive drama, as justification for avoiding the dentist chair becomes easy to find. Life in a chastity cage subjected to the authority of a dominant women is a wonderful existence. All men should have the opportunity to do so, if but just able to see it in an objective light.

Do I want to be let out to masturbate, yes. Absolutely. I do know that to be counter productive to my role as the subservient. Instead I enjoy the sexual frustration and the joy and pleasure in being permitted to bring my wife to an orgasm. It is easily a sufficient substitute that I think all would agree, given the opportunity to experience.

D/s Success:

2011-06-02T07:33:00.004-04:00

Another school year is drawing to a close. Our youngest is graduating from Kindergarten. Our eldest is moving onto fifth grade. Both did very well this year in their respective classes. I attribute this to the oversight my wife provided.

My wife puts a priority on homework getting done correctly. Each child does so before dinner and before any playtime is allowed. When in the third quarter, our eldest had a precipitous drop on grades coming home, my wife adjusted the direction for his homework time. He seemed to be rushing through his homework to be able to play electronics. His was instead restricted from playing during the school week and for many weekends needed to do additional math practice until she saw his grades improving. It worked wonderfully, and he is finishing out the year on a strong academic footing.

The youngest was scored in the top 10%. He is in a private school who would accept him into their kindergarten program with an October birthday. My wife saw he was intelligent enough to start school and decided not to wait until the public school system would let him start the subsequent year. This way, he did not run the danger of becoming disenchanted with school as many over-achievers experience. He did very well and is absolutely ready for the first grade. His grandmother is coming to stay with us to attend his graduation ceremony next week too.

I would like to congratulate my wife on a job well done with the oversight of the children this school year. I find one of the most pronounced positive side effects of our D/s relationship is the benefit the children received from my wife being the authority figure in the house and the one who makes the decisions. It is obvious to me this is due to her better-quality decision making and my subservience to her that allows her direction to be followed unambiguously.

Times In-Between:

2011-05-31T19:37:00.002-04:00

My wife has been in a spell of almost complete absence of dominant behavior. In the past few weeks there have been only a few things I can remember her asking of me. One, was to wash one window on the back door. I had an erection while I did it.

When she goes through times like these, I do not question her reasons, I keep in mind all the wonderful ways she permits me to be subservient to her. There is a lot to be grateful for, as she permits my service to her in many ways that have simply become routine.

A big one of course is being kept chaste. I am locked 24/7 and have not so much as touch my penis in many a fortnight. She maintains the key in a place outside of my knowledge. This is known as chastity dominance.

Also, I have no money but that which she explicitly approves me to have. It is known as financial dominance and I am completely subjected to her. To me it is completely appropriate for a submissive to be subject to their dominant in this way. Money is equal to decision making and freedom. A submissive should have neither and look to their master/mistress for both.

I am permitted to serve my wife in what is knows as domestic servitude. She does not inflict any punishment for failure to comply or tardiness in their completion, but had delegated the responsibility to me solely. This includes cooking the family meals, cleaning the house, and the laundry. She is free from all these obligations.

Our children are raised according to standards my wife chooses. I am a parent, but do not decide. Instead I am subjected to follow the guidelines my wife sets. I have surrendered my parental rights to my wife. She is better suited to make parental decisions. On occasion, she asks my opinion. Most often she does not. It is understood between us that she is superior to me in this arena and I willingly submit to her decisions and follow direction she gives.

As a man infused with male bravado, being subject to the authority of a woman in this way is a wonderful experience which I am very grateful for. My wife’s kindness has permitted my servitude to her to be openly practiced and she has grown comfortable with keeping me in her service. Even though there are times when her overt dominance lessens, it is important for me to remember she keeps me subject through all the ways she had previously established. She keeps me in permanent chastity, leaves me penniless, and obligated to fulfill domestic chores. She enjoys freedom and an unencumbered lifestyle, using my service in ways she has found agreeable.

Mamorial Day Weekend:

2011-05-31T06:10:00.007-04:00

That was a very busy weekend. In included seeing the premier of Kung Fu Panda 2, Pirates – On Stranger Tides, and a full day visit to the local amusement park. We got to the amusement park just as it was opening. Even though it was Memorial Day weekend, before the crowds got too nuts, we had rode the two most popular coasters and were on our way to having lunch. We camped out in the water park area during the heat of the day, and then caught a few more rides and another coaster on the way out.

Monday, I had a chance to do some chores. My wife took the family out to lunch first, since we went to see an early movie, but after that I had the afternoon to do chores. I like to display my subservient role by doing chores while my wife enjoys herself relaxing. That was how the afternoon went. I also helped our eldest with a school project.

We had a quiet remainder of the evening.

Male Chastity Relationships:

2011-05-30T08:05:00.002-04:00

Below is a new comment on the At All Times blog. I agree that a girlfriend presented the prospect of male chastity is much more likely to enjoy the benifits then a wife who is asked to dramaticlly change an existing marriage dynamic. I believe women who are starting relationships can see the benifits objectivly, since they do not have the years of invested interest. A married woman need be willing to make some dramatic changes to how her husband and her interact. This is a more daunting prospect.

COMMENT:
hey! I've been reading all of your three blogs (I check on them when I wake up and before I go to sleep, and sometime during the day).

I'm married to a beautiful wife, but unlike any of you, i've been in chastity since day one since she made me promis I'll give up my orgasms and pleasure all for her in our wedding night in return for her virginity. I orgasm pretty much once a year during our vaccation, but then we're newly wed, so maybe it'll get less or more often.

In the first two years, she was training me to give up my pleasure and orgasms for her and that she's the only one who will orgasm and have pleasure in our house.

I know, it sounds like a fantasy!

well my point is I find it hard to understand how your wives have hard time diving into this, when mine was wet just hearing about it the first time before our marriage. SHE was the one fantasizing about it all the time. she would be at her limit just thinking about it, or just when i would describe a few scenes to her, including punishment scenes of course. she loved everything. she wanted it sooo much more than I did. before marriage she would beg me to have this kinda life with me.

anyway, I just think maybe the more your wife loves you waay too much, the more she'd want this kinda life more than ever.

my wife just was excited about the idea that the man she loves and her only love, will sell his soul to her, and always be dreaming about orgasming inside her when he's actually sleeping right beside her.

so once again, I think the key is "love"! make her love you like she did before, then u'll be surprised how much she'd want you to stop orgasming forever, and give her a massage every night, and make her breakfast every morning while you're naked,...

so LoveWife, be the gentelman, and seduce her good like a handsome CEO of some company would seduce her, and you'll find yourself with one orgasm a year, and trust me, a REALLY REALLY FRUSTRATING hour massaging her naked body with oil after her orgasm every night, while you're not allowed to cum until next july.
seduce her! IT WORKS BEST!

3-Day Weekend (Yea):

2011-05-28T07:13:00.006-04:00

Last week, my wife gave me permission to buy soda. The local store had a special of ten twelve-packs for the price of four. There were two new flavors of Mountain Dew and since the price was so low, I decided to try them. I brought the twelve packs to work and each day added several cans to the community fridge. I think the combination of sugar and caffeine was having an effect. Several times by the time I got home I was edgy. It may have been work too though. Work was very busy this week. Much more so then is common for me. Anyway, I am glad to be at the start of a long weekend.

My wife had planned on taking the family to visit her friend in Atlanta this weekend. The plans fell through at the last minute. She then inquired about going to visit her brother who lives close to the beach, but they were already occupied for the weekend too. Instead, it will be a weekend in town. There are lots of things to do around and I am looking forward to the break.

My chastity shows no signs of ending, since my wife is still looking for a job. The one at my company is on hold for several more weeks. There are a few more she is in consideration for, but nothing eminent. Even if she did quickly find a job, I suspect she will choose to continue my chastity commitment for a good while after. I honestly do not know though. I am close to half a year, and it seems like an annual release would not be out of the question. If so, I seem to have adapted to being locked, no matter what my wife decides is best. I fantasize often and my wife indulges me with teases. The horny level shows no sign of lessening and the sexual frustration is helpful to satisfy my submissive cravings.

I think it will be an enjoyable family weekend. Regardless, I am free from the obligation of work for three days and am able to solely work in service to my wife. As a submissive, it is what I look forward to most.

Submissive Bliss (FICTION):

2011-05-23T17:27:00.013-04:00

As the dim lights of our bedroom cast their long shadows, I look as my wife tightens the ropes around my ankles. She has gotten quite good at doing so over the last few months and can complete the process in only a few motions. My hands have already been secured with handcuffs on the corner headboard post and I am now stretched with my arms above me near the edge of the bed. My wife completes the process and crawls into position next to me. She has found enjoyment in laying me out bound like this on occasion during our evening times together. I am nude except for the chastity device she no longer allows me to remove.

Her enjoyment is to tease and arouse me in the confinement of my chastity device. She seems to enjoy it in a sadistic sort of way. As a submissive man, I enjoy being tormented. For me, it is a treat.

As my wife begins the now routine process of stroking my stomach lightly with her fingers as she speaks seductively in my ear, taking momentary glances to see my erection strain in the confines of the chastity device, her cell phone chimes indicating a new message. She stops and as she reads the message, gets up and goes to the drawer of the night stand. She types what appears to be a response and then takes out a mouth ball gag she uses on me some times. Coming around to the side of the bed, she slips it into place and leaves the room with me exposed and helpless to move or speak.

I hear the front door and my wife speaking in the distance. A few moments later, she comes back in holding the hand of a man. The two look at me and she says, “I hope you don’t mind. I was just having some fun. I never let him out of it.”

The man replies, “It’s alright, but I want the key to make sure he stays locked.” With that my wife takes a key out that I recognize as being the one to the lock on my chastity device and hands it to him. He slips it into his pocket and says, “That’s a good girl, now let’s forget about him and get on with what I came here for.”

The two begin a slow and passionate kiss. My wife is melting into his embrace and he guides her back to the bed. When her legs reach the foot of the bed, she scoots herself onto it without breaking the kiss and is pushed onto her back as he climbs over her. Their kissing continues to increase in intensitity as they position themselves on the bed next to me.

The man begins to enjoy fondling my wife’s breasts and she is very responsive, putting her hand on top of his and showing signs of shuddering pleasure. He lifts her shirt and with a gasp of anticipation, she positions herself so it can be removed freely. I hear as her shirt hits the floor and her breasts are exposed in the dim light. Her nipples are hard and his hand brings them to a point as their kiss continues. Their two bodies are now motioning with rhythmic thrusts that are instinctive when aroused. The two are becoming engrossed in the moment and their arousal is building.

I lay motionless, exposed, locked in a chastity device, and unable to speak, while the two continue apparently having dismissed my presence. My wife is obviously wanting things to proceed as her legs are working around his waist to pull down his pants. He helps by undoing the snap at his waist and moving them down a little. That was all my wife needed as her toes grasp his belt loops and work them down off his legs and they drop with a muffled ‘thud’ onto to the floor below. Her hand reaches between her legs and she guides his erection with a pleaded look on her face.

He accommodates her request and her face exudes pleasure and satisfaction as he penetrates. They look into each other's eyes as the rhythmic thrusting starts slowly. Her face has the pleading of building pleasure begging for it to not stop, and he appears to recognize the expression. He teases her with slowing down and all but coming to a stop, as her hands pull him toward her in a sign of pleading. Slowly, he begins to increase the rhythm and her face shows signs of the desire being fulfilled.

Shortly after, her head turns and mouth opens slightly. Our eyes meet and her breathing starts to quicken. Her breasts are being fondled and the thrusting is increasing. She is holding my gaze as her face turns a shade of red and her breath holds for several seconds. It is clear she is cresting in orgasmic pleasure. When her breath is let out, it is accompanied by an orgasmic cry of ecstasy. The man too arches and holds while cuming to the cries of my wife in the grips of a shuddering orgasm.

Slowly the two brake their embrace, as he slid down to the floor at the foot of the bed. The light dimly illuminating my wife’s nude body, now with a sheen of sweat covering the length. He pulls up his pants, refastens the snap, and comes around to the side of the bed to kiss my wife. The two hold the kiss for a long time as her arm wraps around his neck. He pulls away and says, “His key stays with me. I’ll be the one who fucks you. Understand?”

My wife replies she understands and thanks him for coming over. They kiss again as he stands up and walks out the door. A few seconds later, I hear the front door close.

My wife takes a moment to regain her composure. She was obviously shaken from the intense pleasure. When she does, she turns to me and begins to again stroke my stomach. My body arches to her touch and she looks down to see my erection confined.

“I can tell you enjoyed that as much as I did. Anyway, there is no choice now. Your key just went out the door.”

With that, she continued to stroke my stomach lightly as she drifted off to sleep. For me, the erection was unceasing and I did not find sleep until the early morning. The intensity of the evening kept replaying and my wife sleeping in satisfaction next to me just added to the excitement. I woke to the sound of the alarm clock and my wife undoing my handcuffs, telling me to go make her some coffee.

I jump to her request in submissive bliss.

A Domestic Sunday:

2011-05-23T06:10:00.000-04:00

Sunday, I had a day mostly at the house doing domestic chores. I had been exhausted the day before and several were piling up.

I started the day with my domestic morning chores, but there were a lot more dishes to put away for some reason. Also, I tried a new recipe for pancakes that uses the stand mixer to beat the batter. It incorporated shortening and the pancakes all came out golden brown. Even the first one, which normally gets tossed. They tasted light and fluffy too. Breakfast was a bit of a triumph for me. I finished the pancakes with sliced strawberries and confectioners sugar.

My wife got the household the new Lego Pirate game and the children entertained themselves while my wife gave me a hair cut. I then did the ironing. It had been hanging over the weekend due to my failure to complete it on Friday, as I am expected to do. I am going to try to correct this next time and arrange my time to get the ironing done before the weekend as my wife has directed of me. There was a lot of ironing and in-between I emptied the dishwasher of breakfast load.

My wife needed to run for her training exercise. She had me take our youngest to the park for some outside time while she did. When we got back, I started in on my dinner plans. My wife was tired from her run in the heat and rested with the children.

I was excited to try making home made pasta for the first time. Our stand mixer has an attachment to do so. I had read the instructions during the afternoon and started in on the process. It worked out surprisingly well. I thought since it was my first time there would be problems, but perhaps a pinch of beginners lucked had a play. I finished it with an olive oil mixed with green olives, mushrooms, rosemary, and capers all puréed together. It was served with grilled pork. My wife was hungry and commented on how good it tasted.

There were a lot of dishes and they all barely fit into the washer. I am off now to tend to putting them away and start my work week routine.

Donkey Pulling A Cart of Rocks:

2011-05-22T07:27:00.005-04:00

The day after waking up at three am and being kept obligated until ten pm, I was tired. This was Friday. My wife again needed a massage, but before had me lay on the bed next to her. I still had to put the children to sleep and tend to some laundry. She told me she was horny and would be wanting me to give her an orgasm. Her language was different, but still her indication was clear.

I completed my chores and started the massage she requested for her legs. As it went on, I felt fatigue setting in. Around ten pm, I was litterally fighting off collapsing from exhaustion. My wife kept me going until 10:20 and by then, I was finding it difficult to stand. I fell asleep in a minute or two.

Saturday morning, I felt like a donkey who was asked to pull a cart of rocks up a hill and the cart driver put a carrot in front of me. When I collapsed from exhaustion, the cart driver said, “Sorry, you are too tired for your carrot” I really look forward to going down on my wife and bringing her to an orgasm. To have been led to believe I would be allowed to and then to be driven to exhaustion put me in a pouty mood.

My wife recognized my pouty mood and dug until she found the reason why. I used the donkey and rock cart analogy. She told me she was sorry I was pouty, but did not apologized for not giving me the carrot. That actually brighten my mood as it displayed her dominance over me.

The rest of Saturday, I was still feeling the effects of exhaustion from the two previous days. My wife was none too happy about it and several times while I tried to take a nap, she came and woke me up upset. It culminated with her taking the children to church without me while I finished up a nap.

I prepared dinner while they were away, as my wife had directed. When my wife came home she apologized to me. She indicated she was frustrated with the prospect of being stuck in the house on a Saturday. During the work week, she is home alone most of the time while she searches for a new job. I saw her point and told her it was fine. I understood how it could make her frustrated. That night, I recuperated by watching “The First 48”. I had two episodes saved on the DVR. I love that show. It also gave my brain time to vegetate and my body to rest. This morning I feel back to normal and am getting ready to make a batch of home made pancakes using the stand mixer. I found a recipe about a week ago and have been wanting to try it out.

Submissive Bliss:

2011-05-20T06:04:00.005-04:00

Yesterday, I woke just before three am. I work with technology and as is often the case, work need be done while everyone else is mostly asleep. I finished my work about five, and in the interim, our youngest managed to hoodwink his way to some early morning TV time with dad. I went to take my shower, leaving him to entertain himself.

With my graveyard shift successfully completed, I launched into my normal list of morning domestic chores. It was my laundry day, so in addition to preparing breakfast and empting the dish washer, I also had to get my first laundry load ready. By the time I was leaving for work, things were in order, the way my wife has directed and I was feeling pretty good.

My work day was busy, but not overly so. I came home at lunch to stay on-top of the laundry. I normally switch two loads during my Thursday lunch hour. My wife was home and when I came in, I saw her sitting near the door, looking incredibly beautiful. I went and enjoyed a nice long kiss before cycling the laundry. My wife let me know to plan on giving her a leg massage that night. She had done a long bike ride and needed to have a rub.

My afternoon was pretty normal, except a four pm meeting held me a little longer. As I was commuting home, I began to think about all the things my wife was expecting of me for the night (finishing the laundry, cooking dinner, putting the children to sleep, giving her a massage). Knowing I had gotten up at three am, and her still being dominant with my obligations caused me to become erect and sexually aroused during the drive home. That is just how I am wired. Being dominated causes me pleasure.

I did as expected and her massage lasted about ninety minutes while she watched her TV programs. It felt good to me to be held to task by her and for me it was a highlight of my week. We went to bed while in an embrace. I so love to be openly submissive to a wife who dominates me.

The Answer:

2011-05-18T07:12:00.000-04:00

So I have been grappling with putting into words why being aroused and left sexually frustrated leads to me feeling content under my wife’s authority. Mr. At All Time’s comment was a catalysts for me being able to do so and I am 95% certain I can now say why.

It is spring time. We have a pair of doves living next to the back door to our garage. It was the same thing last year too. Our family has gotten to watch as the two court, lay eggs, and then the newborns hatch, get bigger, and leave the nest. Somehow, male doves know how to court a partner. This is instinct. I see doves courting on occasion and it appears to be a universal behavior.

When I am aroused and left without a way of having an orgasm, I believe I am connected to primitive male courtship behavior. When it is brought to the forefront it effects how I act and feel. It makes me want to do things for my wife.

This is helpful in a D/s relationship. It reinforces to me that male submissives should be kept mostly chaste. It is helpful for their behavior. Keeping them in courtship mode allows a docile attitude of service to their dominant.

Thank you Mr. At All Times for the help.

Sexually Frustrated / Satisfied:

2011-05-17T13:32:00.006-04:00

Yesterday morning after I finished vacuuming the house, my wife kissed me long and passionately and said, ‘Good job with the vacuuming. I like it’ and then sent me off to work with a raging erection confined in my chastity device. Being sexually teased is a big boost to my attitude and motivation. I find it difficult to put into words why that is when I am unable to see the arousal through to orgasm and instead it just causes sexual frustration. How this translates into me being content and responsive to my wife’s leadership is very difficult to describe.

Even though I tremendously desire to feel an orgasm, with it unavailable, I find I also seek alternatives. For instance, my wife making out with me while she plays with my nipples will leave me with a feeling of sexual satisfaction since I will have had a sexual encounter that I enjoyed. Also too, the opportunity of being invited between my wife’s legs so she can be brought to an orgasm always leaves me with having my sexual side satisfied. Even though I do not achieve an orgasm and am left sexually frustrated in that respect, the encounters themselves have become a sufficient substitute, I find.

So when I am teased through being brought to arousal, or am given a gift of a sexual encounter with my wife, it gives me the enjoyment of the encounter in spite of the remaining sexual frustration at not having achieved orgasm. Somehow, this brightens my demeanor and makes me glad to do the next thing my wife directs of me in service to her. I can not really say why.

Locked:

2011-05-16T06:10:00.004-04:00

In the past, I have posted the above photo of my key. My wife keeps it in a special silk pouch hidden somewhere. I realized that today I have rounded the four month mark and decided to post a photo of my lock. The two (the key and the lock) have not seen each other in a long time and it looks like it will be even longer still. Here is a photo of my actual lock.

Last week, my wife was notified the job she is the leading candidate for at my company is on hold for at least six weeks. As I am to be kept chaste at least until she starts her next job, it looks like that will likely be my first opportunity. She had another interview, but the location is far and she is one of ten being considered for selection. She does not put her chances high on that one.

When I offered to my wife to link my chastity duration to her unemployment, I knew I would most likely be in for about six months. Also, my wife has confirmed that her getting a job does not automatically mean I will be given my key. Just that it is a prerequisite. During this difficult time, it feels like service to her.

I find myself well in check. My wife has many concerns. Me being kept locked is helpful in keeping me docile and engaged to her desires. She enjoys me bringing her to orgasm and I find those encounters are sexually satisfying to me as well. My wife brought up that it was kinda selfish for me to drive to go down on her to feel pleasure myself. It is hard to explain. I feel pleasure when she does. This drives me to to things she enjoys, sexual pleasure too. I do not think this is the same as taking advantage of a girl selfishly for sex. My wife may be right to an extent and she only permits me between her legs when SHE wants it or feels I deserve a treat.

I do know my wife may choose to enjoy my chastity as status-quo now. My conflictions on the subject I find are difficult to put into words. Anyway, four months have come and gone in chastity under the authority of my wife.

Male Chastity Manifesto:

2011-05-14T12:54:00.001-04:00

We are men who wear an apparatus that prevents us from having intercourse or an orgasm without the return of a locking key. We have come into this circumstance for a variety of reasons;

1) Some of us have had it made a necessity by the women in our lives because our errant ways were discovered. The breach of trust discovered either from excessive masturbation or infidelity led to the apparatus solution being required.

2) Some of us have come to the conclusion through introspection and self discovery that it would be best for us to surrender the key to such an apparatus to the women in our lives.

3) Some of us are masochistic and seek the bondage the apparatus provides.

4) Some of us live in Feminine Dominance (FemDom) relationships and the women in our lives require it as apart of our service to them.

We are subjected to a wide variety of subsequent paths once we are locked. Some of these include, being spanked and otherwise routinely punished, our anuses penetrated by strap-on dildos, turned into domestic servants, made to be humiliated through wearing women’s clothing, routinely teased about the lack of our sexual stamina. Others have nothing save the apparatus as a consequence.

Some of us have had our last orgasm, as we will never see the key again. Others are given the key for a single orgasm per year. Others are put on a schedule which requires a duration of good behavior or some other goal being met before we see our key. Still others are only kept locked as a means of introducing sexual tension into a relationship and are given our key frequently.

We are from every walk of life. If you knew our numbers, you would be amazed how many we are. Every day more and more join. We acknowledge this is mainly due to female authority becoming more accepted in our society and we embrace the change.

We all have known the moment when our key was first handed over. We all know the indescribable pleasure with being permitted to bring the women in our lives to orgasm while we are kept chaste. The women in our lives enjoy our attentive devotion that their holding our key brings. In these we are all common.

Nutritional Consciousness:

2011-05-09T07:33:00.002-04:00

This may be male chauvinistic, but I think it is fair to say women are much more conscious of what they eat then men are. I think this is in part because the slender image society imposes, but also because women are more aware of subtleties in their bodies and are therefore more prone to be conscious of what they eat. I on the other hand, have a long history of eating anything put in front of me. I think most men are oblivious to subtleties of nutrition as much as women are. I know for sure this is no where near a universal statement. I know many men who are picky eaters and many women who are obese, but I do believe generally it is true women are more nutrition conscious.

My wife has been leading our relationship for a long time now. A change that has happened slowly is what the family eats has come under her scrutiny. Also, my wife has been trying a few different approaches to her own physical fitness and nutritional program. Recently, she has started to use a web-site called ‘Training Peaks’. I work in the computer industry and had been looking for an electronic way of tracking what she eats. Training Peaks is the answer I had been hoping for.

Everything she eats has the nutritional information entered into her profile and then portions are assigned in her menu. The program takes care of calculating her protine/fat/carb ratios as well as her caloric intake. Further, a local trainer she works with reviews her nutritional information and assigns exercise routines for her to reach her goals. The system is awesome. I love it so much.

What I have found is eating a diet that is not overwhelmingly carbohydrates takes planning and effort. Protein and good fat are hard to come by. Things like nuts and cheese are helpful, but even still, I have to be careful to keep an eye on too many carbohydrates sneaking in.

Also, the exercise of reading the nutritional information on everything she eats has been a good educational exercise for me to learn about foods. I had never paid nutrition any mind. I tried to keep my weight in check, but otherwise, was fine eating whatever. This new healthy consciousness is due to following the leadership of my wife.

It is also apparent to me that nutrition consciousness is becoming more prominent in society. Personally, I believe this is due to women having command of a larger portion of purchasing decisions from their increase in career status and the market reacting. I have no study to back this up. It is just conjecture on my part, but feel it a fair statement. Things like, nutritional information being printed on McDonalds wrappers, Frito-Lay’s popularity of “baked” products, and whole grain varieties of just about anything to just name a few. It is clear nutritional conscious consumers are having products catered to their demands. I feel this will only increase in popularity as women continue to assume leadership roles and further extended their part in prominent career positions.

Mother's Day:

2011-05-07T06:54:00.002-04:00

With tomorrow being "Mother's Day" here in the United States, I wanted to pass along a wonderful resource. Martha Stewart's internet site has an amazing collection of ideas. Of course you can go get your wife a new rock or bling-bling, but for the rest of us who are on a small budget, these are great ideas that cost next to nothing and have big "Awweee" factors.

http://www.marthastewart.com/photogallery/mothers-day-gifts

Last weekend, I brought our children to my office and we had a time together preparing several of the simple crafts and going over the plan for the day. There was a pretty small shopping list we went and got together too. The cost is low (considering my wife's current unemployment), but our heartfelt expression of love for her I am sure will come through.

Slave Commitment:

2011-05-05T08:33:00.008-04:00

Yesterday was very busy. I woke at my usual five a.m., showered/dressed and then did the morning chores of empting the dishwasher and preparing breakfast. I then separated the laundry before going to work. I had a 4:30 meeting that kept me late. When I made it home my wife and children were waiting outside for me to take them to Faith Formation class at church. We got home after seven and I quickly made my wife her dinner. While she ate, I took care of putting the children to sleep. After watching about twenty minutes of TV with my wife, I gave her a massage until after ten p.m.. It was a very hectic day.

Today, is my laundry day. Plus, it is the cycle where I launder the bed sheets. That adds to the number of loads I need to tend to and is again shaping up to be a very busy day with little time not accounted for.

It is my hope that my wife will find a way to always occupy my time in a form of slave labor like has occurred yesterday and today. I know that is impractical since I quickly run out of chores to keep me busy during my waking hours, as occurred yesterday and looks like today as well. Plus, my wife finds it a burden to have to think of things for me to do and inevitably I find myself idle.

My wife has seemed to become more and more comfortable with the concept of her leisure time being ensured by burdens being placed on me. I would hope this continue and the idea of all my waking hours accounted for by slave activities is something I can hope becomes a pattern that more often then not occurs. My wife in general expresses a companion stance with me. I know the change into one of looking at me with distain to be a big change as well as feeling comfortable expressing it to me. Days like yesterday and today make me hopeful she may be becoming confortable doing so to some degree. As a submissive, I crave feeling her authority like this and am thankful when I do.

Also, it is my hope my wife is able to incorporate an attitude of distain towards me in this respect. We have children who are aware of our interactions. This prevents her from being too overt in her authority over me when we are not alone. When we are alone, I find I crave her expressing distain to me and coming to expect a subservient attitude from me. My wife has ruled out punishments, as it is not something she is comfortable with yet. She has said it is something she still reconsiders her comfort with from time to time. It is my hope as well that she would see fit to punish me when she feels it would be helpful to my service to her.

The busy few days has brought to the surface how much submissive pleasure I am being given as a gift by my wife through the obligations she has placed on me and has me hopeful it will become more accepted between us and she would feel comfortable with holding an attitude of distain towards me and feeling comfortable expressing it while we are alone. I guess time will tell, but I wanted to post about how grateful I am for this current spell of commitment she has placed on me.

The Non-Consensual Ruse:

2011-05-04T11:19:00.021-04:00

About a year ago, my wife and I agreed that I should wear a chastity device. In our marriage, I have always looked to her for direction. She is smarter then me and has a beautiful body. She found me masturbating and after a discussion, it was agreed best to get me something to help me stop.

My wife had me take off work to bring her to the doctor. She was having an outpatient procedure done and needed someone to drive. I waited until the nurse let me know she was done and I should pull the car around to the side door. I was waiting there only a few minutes when the nurse brought my wife out holding her steady. She was obviously under the effect of the medication. She was bobbing her head unsteady in her walk to the car. The nurse helped me get her into the car, I fasten her seat belt and we went home.

I swung by the local pharmacy to fill the recovery prescription and then when we made it home, I helped her transition onto the couch. The nurse had told me to let her sleep it off and I covered her with a blanket and remained close, but quite while she rested. About three hours later, she woke and after coming to her senses asked me several questions about the procedure. She said, “I don’t remember any of it at all.” She then looked at me seductively and said, “Did you take advantage of me?”

I of course said that I didn’t. I guess I am too submissive to ever try anything like that and blush as I turned away. She caught my reaction and followed up by saying, “Maybe you should of.” That caused an erection in my chastity device, which she seemed to enjoy doing recently.

The morning continued and after a few hours my wife said she was hurting and asked for a pill from the prescription. I brought her one with a glass of water. She looked into my eyes with a glint of mischief as she drank down the pill. After about twenty minutes, she again had the glazed over look to her eyes that she had when leaving the doctor that morning. Thinking that she had told me I should take advantage of her and that she did not remember anything got me thinking. My wife was comfortable keeping me in a chastity device, but I had found I enjoyed the idea of her being more dominant over me in several other ways. Each time I brought the other things up, she always said ‘no’. Maybe now was a chance to try a few.

I quickly went upstairs and got her hair brush. I came down and kneeled on the floor in front of the couch where she was laying and asked, “Would you do me a favor and spank me? I broke a dish in the kitchen and feel guilty.”

“Suuuurrrrreee” came her slurred reply. I was so glad. I had asked her several time before and she had always said she wasn’t comfortable doing so. I wasted no time taking off my clothes and laying over the ottoman in front of her. As she stood wobbelly and took up the hair brush, I smiled in my success and decided to see if I could push it a little further.

“All I ask is before you start, that you take off your shirt so it doesn’t get in the way.”

My wife didn’t say anything, but seemed to agree as she quickly took off her shirt. I looked up at the magnificent view of her topless, holding the hair brush ready to begin swatting my ass. As I turned back away a smile of satisfaction settled in. That ended quickly when she landed the first blow with what seemed to be perfect aim and technique. I felt hot pain bolt through my body and I instinctively convulsed in pain. The loud crack sounded like a perfect hit and the pain was quickly followed by several more hits landing in almost perfect succession in the same spot. The sharp pain increases with each blow and I quickly started to shed tears in response. I held onto the ottoman with my mouth agape. I tried a few times to fend the oncoming blows with my hands, but my wife pushed them aside and hit my open palm in response. I do not know how long it went on, but my wife lay back onto the couch and was asleep before I regained composure.

Standing upright hurt. Walking hurt. I could not even think of sitting down. I put away the items and slowly redressed. My wife awoke about dinner time and I had a light meal ready for her. She gave no indication of remembering anything after taking her medication.

The next morning was Saturday and my wife woke again in pain asking for a pill. I brought it to her with a morning bagel and coffee. She thanked me and after about 30 minutes of watching TV she again was beaming a glazed stare. I decided again to take an opportunity. I asked, “how about if I get you some clothes to put on.” I always like for her to wear revealing clothing. She had several bra tops she never wore. I got out a low cut bra top a pair of sandals and a pair of shorts. Putting on the skin tight shirt, she looked amazing and I couldn’t wait to take her out. I decided to go on a mall trip.

As we walked to the mall entrance, I said, “Hey, if any guys start looking at you, go over to them and ask them if they like what they see.” She smiled in response and I left her at the map inside for a minute to see if anyone would take the bait. Sure enough, in less then a minute, a group of young men decided they too needed to look closely at the map. My wife quickly began to seductively talk to them and even draped her arms around the neck of one. She said something to his ear and he looked back at her with a surprised look and then she turned to catch my eye. She beckoned me with her finger and I came to when the group was. The guy who my wife had her arms around his neck said, “Your wife says she wants me to fuck her and you would be glad if I did.” I could not believe it worked so easy, and quickly responded, “Yes sir. If it would be okay, I would be glad to drive you to our house so you can enjoy yourself with her. She seems to want to very much.” He nodded in approval and we proceeded to walk back out to our car, with their arms around each other.

When I pulled into the garage, they were already kissing in the back seat and my wife grinding herself against him. I opened the door for them and closed it behind me. They made their way into the bedroom and I quietly began closing the door to give them the privacy they seemed to need.

“No, you get back in her. You have to watch.” My wife proceeded to tell him how she keeps me locked in a chastity device and was so needing a proper fucking. The two had already gotten mostly out of their clothes in that short time and as I watched my wife gasped in impending orgasmic pleasure as he sunk his erect cock into her. A moan of what could be called nothing but joy came out of her as he did and proceeded to follow the initial penetration with gradually increasing thrusts. He was much larger then me and it was clear my wife was enjoying the size difference. She continued to build to an obviously impending orgasm and just as her body released the signs that she was climaxing, he too changed his thrusting to ones of ejaculating holds. Her body shuddered and her face froze in ecstasy.

The thrusting ended and two lay in an embrace. The guy climbed off and I asked if would like for me to bring him back to the mall, which he accepted. My wife was already asleep and while he dressed, I quickly straightened up the room and by the time I was back, it was almost lunch. I prepared a sandwich for when she woke, going over how wonderful it was to have been her cuckold that morning. The feeling had me numb with pleasure. It had always been a hope to become cuckolded by her, but she was just against the idea and it did not come up in conversations between us anymore. The actual feeling was amazing. I could barely feel the floor beneath me and my face was tingling in a blissful pleasure. I returned to the bedroom to find my wife just waking up.

“You feeling better?” I asked as I handed her the lunch I had prepared. She said she did feel much better, but thought she may need another pill in a bit.

Just as I was getting dinner ready, my wife called down from the bedroom and asked another pill be brought up with her dinner. I knew my plan for this time. I sat with her as she ate and as she was finishing her desert she began to become disorientated again. I let it settle in for a few minutes and then stood to take her dinner plates away. As I came back upstairs, I asked, “Would you mind if I put on one of your silk camisoles?” I had secretly wanted to be put into feminine clothing for awhile. The humiliation of having my wife enjoy another man and then to be feminized as an added humiliation had been a fantasy of mine for awhile. My wife was just too prude to consider those and it never came up. This time though, she smiled and just lay back and watched as I undressed. I put my clothes away in the drawers until I was completely nude except for the chastity device. I then went to the closet where my wife’s silk camisoles hung. I decided on a blue silk one that had thin straps and embroidered flowers. I came back out and pulled it over my head in front of her as she gazed on.

It fit surprisingly well. I have very slight boobs which filled the cups to some extent and the waist was about right. I didn’t fill the hips like it should, but all in all, a pretty close size match. My wife’s mouth opened a little with what looked like desire. I was a little confused by the expression. She said, “You look good. Go put on the blue necklace from my jewelry box.”

I found the one she meant and it did seem to add to what I was wearing. When I came back out of the closet, she wore an expression of even more arousal. “Yes, that is better. Good girl.” When she said that, I started to become erect in my chastity device. She was taking control of making me wear things and the humiliation of my wife telling me I looked better dressed as a girl was having a sexual reaction in me. “Go add the blue hair bow. I think you will look pretty in it too.”

As I did as she asked and came back in the room, it was clear she was getting horney looking at me. I felt vulnerable, but lay down in the bed next to her as she was prompting me to by patting the mattress next to her. As I did, she took position hovering over me and with a look of desire, slowly ran a finger on the inside of one of the shoulder straps, teasing with pushing it down to my arm. She did this for a minute with her mouth agape. Once the strap was down, she also lightly pushed down the cup so my breast was exposed on one side. My nipple was hard and she lightly began to play with it and cup my breast. It was making me so hard, the chastity device was hurting, but I could not stop enjoying it.

My wife made out with me for a long time, feeling my breasts, playing with my nipples, and probing between my legs with her fingers. When she couldn’t take it any more, she rolled over and pushed my head between her legs and pulled my face into her pussy. It was soaking wet and I knew the things she liked. Living in a chastity device, I had gotten really good at going down on my wife and she erupted in an orgasm after only a few minutes. There was still some of the guys cum in her which I covertly cleaned out as well. After her orgasm, she drifted off to sleep for the night. I cleaned up and put all her things away and went to sleep too. Having been used like that was a dream come true.

The next morning, my wife was feeling better. I asked her if she needed any more medicine. She said, “Yes dear. It is an antibiotic and I need to take it for ten days.”

Antibiotic, I thought. Wait a minute. Those don’t have any side effects and I went to the prescription bottle and read “Amoxicillin. Take twice a day for ten days.” I looked back at my wife. She wore a smile and then came over, kissed me on the cheek, and then walked away.

:pls note, this is a work of fiction. thank you...

_

Confliction of Chastity:

2011-05-02T11:16:00.006-04:00

Last night, my wife lightly played with my nipples before going to sleep. It was very arousing to me and appreciated. She does know me well and can turn me on with little effort since she knows what things I respond to strongly. In chastity, those things are a big motivation boost. All the D/s books we have say so and for me it is true.

I have recently been reflecting how long I could go in my current sexually frustrated state. I believe the answer is indefinitely, but I really do not know. I am in a twisted knot of emotions of feeling sexual desires and arousal, followed by the frustration that enforced chastity bring. The frustration satisfies my submissive traits quite well and feed into my docile attitude. I do know I will be kept chaste at least until my wife starts her next job, but wonder just how long I can go without being let out. The honest answer is I do not know but am also truthfully grateful to my wife for agreeing to keep me locked. I have no way of knowing when I will see the key again.

I went through a bit of a pouting spell Saturday morning. I though my wife would want me to bring her to an orgasm, but she did not. When I expressed the reason for my poor attitude, she told me she is not a mind reader. I again expressed my desire for her to invite me to go down on her with greater frequency. She has been having some sleeping issues and is scheduled to discuss them with her doctor tomorrow. She has not had much of a desire for me to and has enjoyed instead a platonic dynamic between us. In chastity, I get a great deal of pleasure being permitted to go down on her and bring her to orgasm. Also too, as a submissive, the absence is enjoyable in a sense as it is a display of her desires being paramount between us.

Since I am already on my way to the fourth month, I am reluctantly hoping she chooses to enjoy me denied for a year+. That is not something I think I could say I would ever consider on my own. As a submissive in service to a woman willing to enjoy my gift of submission changes my perspective and secretly I find the desire hard to ignore. Also too, the desire to be free of my confines for some heathenistic behavior lies just out of reach. Apart of the conflicted enjoyment I feel is I do not hold the decision. I am subject and in that I feel my true place in the relationship realized.

24/7 Service Submissive:

2011-04-29T13:14:00.000-04:00

Recently, I have realize that I have all but no leisure time. When I am not doing chores, I spend time with my wife. Normally, this is sitting with her while she watches tv programming. She enjoys me being available to spend time with and I see it as a form of service to be available for her to enjoy. I have to admit, even though I am watching programming of her choosing, I too enjoy being close to her and spending time with her. As such, I organize my schedule to complete my domestic chores outside of time when she expects me to be available for her to spend time with.

The life of a 24/7 service submissive is one of domestic servitude. This obligation placed on me by my dominant causes pleasure. To be put to task in order for her to have more leisure time is a condition I encourage, as it displays to me my wife’s acceptance of D/s principles. Actions speak louder then words, and being told to do chores while she enjoys leisure activities to me speaks volumes that my wife is comfortable with using my gift of submission to her enjoyment. When she does so, I feel submissive pleasure.

Having recently realize that my life is almost completely void of personal leisure time has been of comfort. It is a recognition that I am a submissive in servitude to a dominant woman. I do not feel the loss of the leisure time as much as I might expect. Occasionally, I will wish to go see a given movie or go out and buy some new shiny consumer electronic product. As I realize it is a decision of my wife’s to keep me all but void of leisure time, my body strangely reacts with pleasure. Being subject to her authority is what I crave, as is common among all submissives.

The old adage, ‘A woman’s work is never done’ is where I find myself now adays. Perhaps in a generation or two, the gender in this adage will change. However, I find I am busy with work and chores. When I complete my daily responsibilities, I find my wife and sit with her so she can enjoy my company. I know there are many single parents out there who are like me in maintaining household chores alone. I do not find this at all over taxing. Unlike them, I am this way as a result of giving my wife a gift of submission and her directing me into domestic servitude to her. She decides the method of my chores and how the household will operate. This includes the aspects of how the children are raised, where disposable income is used, and how the family free time is spent. She rarely asks my input on any of these, but occasionally does ask for my view. When she does, she considers what I say, but still makes the final decision. It is this subjection to her authority that I crave and enjoy.

I asked my wife if she would be comfortable with being more harsh with me concerning how I complete my tasks. This would be a gift she would be giving me, as she know I would enjoy feeling her dominance over me. The word "Harsh" was a little much for her, but she did say she doesn't mind pointing out when she sees a way I do a chore that she wants to change. Also, she is fine adding to what I do as we go along. To me that is a gift my dominant gives me and makes me feel the submissive pleausre of being used. After all, that is what a submissive desires and the gift a dominant gives.

Chastity Captions FYE:

2011-04-28T02:06:00.002-04:00

Click on Image to Enlarge;

NEXT--->

Wife's Job Search

2011-04-27T07:26:00.001-04:00

Today my wife has a job interview at the company I work for. It is a two hour interview starting at 2:00pm for a position of corporate trainer. I understand, she is the only candidate being considered for and I think her chances are good to have the interview turn into an offer. I know her skills would be valuable to the department, as she holds a graduate degree in education and has extensive relevant professional experience. The job appears to be a good match for both her goals and the department’s needs.

When I was unemployed, my wife helped me get an interview with her employer at their headquarters in Orlando, FL. They flew me out, put me up in a hotel, paid for my meals and rental car. After the interview, I went to the Walt Disney World restaurant area and smoked a cigar overlooking the lagoon. I felt like a million bucks. In the midst of the frustration of unemployment, it was a major moral boost. I was down to one of two candidates being considered, but lost to the other who was an internal candidate. That was difficult to bear, but being considered was a wonderful opportunity. Being brought in for an interview is a real jolt during unemployment. It is a wonderful feeling of hope and an opportunity to discuss your talents with a perspective employer. I am glad she has made it to this stage for this opportunity. She does have others on the horizon, but today, she can celebrate this achievement and I am glad to see her be able to.

If she is extended an offer, we will be working on the same floor of the office building. We worked in the same office building during the year after we first met. It is surprising how even though you are so close that work keeps you occupied. There are the times of chance encounters where I will see her smile and be able to see her put her extensive skills to use. I do hope it works out for her in a way that she sees best. She is deserving of nothing less and a transition into a position of enjoyment is fitting, considering her talents and career level. She should be able to find a place she can enjoy herself and be recognized for the skills she posses and intelligent perspectives in professional settings.

Subservient Husband (to a loving wife)

Week Away:

CB-6ks There & Back Again:

Birthday Weekend

Into The Rabbit Hole:

Locked Tigher Then Ever:

Holiday Shifs:

Female Superiority Seekers:

In-Between Holidays:

A Reminder:

Thanksgiving Week:

Submissives Thankful for Pain:

Shifts in Service:

Female Superiority:

Subservient Lifestyle:

Book: The Subservient Husband

Mistress Roulette

D/s Update:

Vanilla Wife / Submissive Husband

Alternative Mediums

Post Orgasm Submissive Duldrums:

P.o.I. - 2Mths Away

Inner Termoil

Forbes Magazine Report - 100 Most Powerful Women in the World:

A servant in the service to the court of Catherine of Russia:

The Kumari:

Chores Update:

Mr. Blue:

Table of Contents:

Chp 3. ‘Vanilla’ Approach:

Chp 2. The Transition Phase:

Chp 1. An Introduction:

Preface:

Chp 5. Conclusion:

Chp 4. Aggressive Approach:

Mr. Blue:

In Defense of Male Chastity:

Vetting via Blogging:

Socital Shift - Report from Time Magazine:

24/7 Service Submissive:

Matriarchy Comes To Hollywood:

6-Mths

Dominant Wife:

Submissive Househusband:

Chastity Captions:

Return of an Old Friend:

A Word From Our Sponsor:

Side Benifit:

Time Draws Near:

Working Dominant:

Wife's Birthday:

Boiled Down WLM:

Procedure Day:

In The Storm:

Ms. Rika Interview:

Glue for the Lock FICTION:

Transition Back To Normal:

Busy Weeks:

Prison Cell:

Following A Suggestion - FICTION:

Nipple Play:

New T.V. Show:

Life in a Cage:

D/s Success:

Times In-Between:

Mamorial Day Weekend:

Male Chastity Relationships:

3-Day Weekend (Yea):

Submissive Bliss (FICTION):

A Domestic Sunday:

Donkey Pulling A Cart of Rocks:

Submissive Bliss:

The Answer:

Sexually Frustrated / Satisfied:

Locked:

Male Chastity Manifesto:

Nutritional Consciousness:

Mother's Day:

Slave Commitment:

The Non-Consensual Ruse: